The H8ful Eight

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
 The H8ful Eight
  Released 12/25/15

Genius?  Madman?  Maybe a little bit of both.  There's no denying that producer/director, Quentin Tarantino, is one of a kind.  With his ninth directorial feature, The H8ful Eight (H8ful, get it?), Tarantino gives us another eclectic mix of pathos, mirth, and mayhem. 

One signature of a Tarantino film is the cast he uses.  Like many top directors, he tends to rely on the same group through thick and thin.  This time is no different as the likes of Samuel L. Jackson, Tim Roth, Michael Madsen, Kurt Russell, Zoe Bell (in a minor role), and Walton Goggins return for more whacky madness.  This time around they're joined by new names in the Tarantino carousel (Bruce Dern, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Channing Tatum, and Demian Bichir).  So, what type of story brought this "merry" bunch together?

Tarantino returns to 19th century America, the same century visited in his previous film, Django Unchained.  However, this time the audience is taken to the wilds and wintery wonderland of post-Civil War Wyoming instead of the Antebellum South.  Speeding desperately to a safe haven on the way to the town of Red Rock riding a six-horse stagecoach, we find infamous bounty hunter, John "The Hangman" Ruth (Russell) "escorting" his latest score, Daisy Domergue (Leigh), with the intention of collecting the $10,000 pricetag on her head.  Ruth is a no-nonsense kind of guy who doesn't hesitate tuning Daisy up at every opportunity when she gets out of line, which is often.  Now, before you feel too bad for Daisy falling victim to a man who gets his jollies beating women, know that she is a foul-mouthed, racist, murderous little psychopath.

Trying to stay ahead of a coming blizzard, the duo and stage driver run into Marquis Warren (Jackson), a former Union officer in one of the North's black regiments during the war.  Warren is also a bounty hunter who has been stranded in the middle of the blizzard with his quarry of "prisoners" all of whom he has killed.  Ruth and Warren are past acquaintances and, against Ruth's better judgement, he offers Warren and his cargo transport.  Still farther along the trail, the group encounters another poor soul stranded in the middle of nowhere.  This would be Chris Mannix (Goggins), who claims to be the soon-to-be sworn in new sheriff of Red Rock.  Mannix is a former Confederate renegade who ran with his father's marauders during the war earning quite the reputation as a degenerate killer in some eyes.  He convinces the two hunters that if they leave him to die on the road, they'll have a difficult time collecting their bounties with him being the new sheriff who would be in charge of paying them.  Naturally there's a conflict between Mannix and Warren for several reasons. 

The group, now five strong (eight if you count Warren's dead bodies), comes to the only building that can offer them shelter from the storm before moving on to Red Rock, Minnie's Haberdashery.  Warren knows Minnie personally and is surprised when the coach is greeted by Bob (Bichir), a mysterious man of Mexican origin (this little fact will have meaning later) who claims to have been placed in charge of watching the lodge while Minnie is away visiting her mother.  Inside the lodge, a motley group awaits the new arrivals.  There's Oswaldo Mobray (Roth), an overly friendly Englishman who says he is the actual hangman of Red Rock.  We have Joe Gage (Madsen), a quiet, brooding cowboy who says he's on his way to see his mother.   Finally, there's Sanford Smithers (Dern), a former Confederate general who's there for unknown reasons.  Over the course of a few hours, loyalties will be tested, alliances will form, and secrets will unfold.  You get that many volatile personalities under one roof and what do you have?  Why a Tarantino-style powder keg, of course.

The H8ful Eight is a bit of a departure for Tarantino in that he tries his hand at mystery for the first time that I am aware.  Not every character is what he/she seems.  Some are exactly as they seem.  As you'll discover, these people have very few redeeming qualities, but, some goodness does emerge, and it comes from places you would never expect.  Of course, some characters are just outright scumbags and are exactly who you think they are. 

And what would a Tarantino movie be without buckets of blood, gleefully over-the-top violence, and a generous use of the N-word (by pretty much everyone outside of Jackson)?  You have to admire someone who goes to places on film that most wouldn't dare.  And, he gets away with it.  Somehow the idiocy and nastiness in The H8teful Eight fits together in an intricate little puzzle works in the end.  I don't know how he does it, but, he does in just about every movie he's associated with.  When he should be offending you, he's entertaining you and making you laugh out loud at things you know you shouldn't be amused by. He has a talent.  That's undeniable. 

As racist as the characters in the film are, Tarantino also surprisingly gives you a modicum of hope.  Horrible people aren't necessarily unredeemable.  Racism is a learned behavior.  It can be overcome.  The messages in the movie go deep albeit in a twisted way.

While The H8ful Eight is still no Pulp Fiction in my mind, I do call it one of the director's better efforts.  You want to cringe?  You want to be grossed out?  You want to laugh your head off?  This film can be all of that for you.  And, at almost three hours, you get plenty to chew on.

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

****1/4 stars

Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
 Star Wars:  The Force Awakens
  Released 12/18/15

It's here.  The cinematic leviathan.  The big kahuna.  The hammer of Thor.  OK, it's obvious I'm running out of descriptions.  But, you all understand me.  The long awaited continuation of arguably the biggest movie saga of all time has arrived.  Of course, I can only be talking about Star Wars:  The Force Awakens.  Yes, the film whose trailer alone supposedly "broke" the internet.  But, as crazy as the anticipation for this film was, it didn't come without some trepidation in some circles.

We might as well address the elephant in the room first.  That would be the prequel trilogy, Episodes I-III.  To say there were mixed feelings about George Lucas's effects-laden tale depicting the origin of Darth Vader would be the grossest of understatements.  We all know the issues the masses had with those movies, so I'm not going to rehash them here.  George Lucas.  The man who could not make a misstep from 1977-83, was making nothing but missteps in many eyes from 1999-05.  Rabid fans of his first trilogy were disappointed by and vocal about the prequels.  Could he win those fans back with a new movie or new set of movies?  We'll never know, because he sold his baby to the House of Mouse to the tune of...well, a lot.  So, problem solved, right?  When Disney announced they would take on the monumental task of continuing the Star Wars saga, fans had to feel a little better, right?  Disney didn't spend billions to make junk.  So, of course, they would find an all-world director to helm this little endeavor.  It's only reasonable.

That brings me to the second issue, J.J. Abrams.  I personally don't have a problem with Abrams, but, many do.  Just ask the "Trekkies."  There's a contingent of those fans that believe he ruined their beloved franchise.  Speaking solely for myself, I like his take on Star Trek quite a bit.  But, I've never been accused of being a die hard fan of the franchise, so I can't deny the Trekkies their anger.  Putting myself in their shoes, I know I would be extremely upset if I thought Abrams disrespected the material I grew up loving.  We kind of saw that type of thing with Josh Trank's Fantastic Four this summer. 

As of my writing of this review, I've seen The Force Awakens twice now.  I deliberately held back my review of this film for a reason.  Like any Star Wars mega-fan, I was jumping out of my skin waiting for this movie.  I was even antsy in the theater.  Then, when John Williams' famous score hit my ears, I was five years old again seeing A New Hope for the very first time.  This was a problem.  You see, I had this very same reaction in 1999 when I saw The Phantom Menace the first time.  No one could tell me it wasn't good.  Lucas could have done a naked hula dance on screen and I would have eaten it up because it was called "Star Wars."  That's how deep my love of the franchise ran.  But, as time went by, I saw it several more times and I took a better look at it with a more discerning eye.   I realized something about Phantom Menace.  Most of that really sucked!  What was I thinking?  I know what I was thinking now.  It had been 16 years since the last Star Wars movie.  I was giddy that Star Wars was back.  Like I said, at first sight, I would have been over the moon about anything I saw onscreen.  That's why I took a step back this time.  I thought about it.  I let it "marinate" so to speak. 

So, the verdict?  After rerunning things in my head more than a few times, I can say with relative confidence that Star Wars is in capable hands.  Disney chose the right director for its first stab at the iconic series.  Abrams had what has to be the most exhilarating, and, at the same time the most frightening director's job in Hollywood.  He seems to have a love for the material which is a huge plus.   It's an homage to A New Hope in many ways, but, it also acts as an excellent launching pad for the new trilogy.

The Force Awakens has the feel and spirit of original trilogy much more than the prequels.  It's filled with high adventure mixed with a healthy dose of mythology and a tad of silliness.  And I don't mean silliness of the JJB kind if you know what I mean.  Gone are the CGI-laden sets and the feeling of "sterileness".  To be fair to the prequels, that's likely what Lucas was going for, a more polished and less war torn look given the era in this universe's history.  Of course, there's still plenty of CGI in the new movie, but it's a less polished piece of work than what we last saw from this series.  The Force Awakens has a rougher, more organic feel to it.  The lightsaber duels especially  have a crudeness and brutality to them that haven't been seen before.  The Force Awakens  just felt a little more like the Star Wars I grew up with.

Abrams has also raised the stakes in The Force Awakens as far as storyline.  Hopefully, without giving too much away if you haven't seen it, I'll say tragedy is a part of war.  While Episodes IV-VI had  loads of conflicts, in the grand scheme of things, there wasn't a great amount of tragedy that befell our heroes.  There's a scene in TFA that's going to get very real for SW fanatics.  It's sad, but, it's also a sad necessity given where I think the story is headed.

Speaking of where the story is headed, the "new guard" is introduced in TFA.  We still have our old standbys of Han Solo (Harrison Ford), Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamill), and Princess Leia (Carrie Fisher), as well as, Chewbacca (Peter Mayhew), C-3PO (Anthony Daniels), and R2-D2 (Kenny Baker).  But they're taking a bit of a back seat in this one (in one character's case, waaaay in the back).  But, the torch is being passed to the likes of Finn (John Boyega), a defected Stormtrooper, Poe Dameron (Oscar Isaac), a hotshot fighter pilot, Rey (Daisy Ridley), a mysterious scavenger, and new resident baddie, Kylo Ren (Adam Driver), the guy you've seen in all the previews and trailers with the gnarly crossguard lightsaber. All are introduced to varying degrees of success.  That's not to say any of the new characters are bad.  Some just pack a greater punch (Rey, Kylo Ren) than others at this point. 

As far as storyline is concerned, these are the things you need to know.  It takes place 30 years after Return of the Jedi.  Luke Skywalker has vanished under mysterious circumstances.  Both the First Order (descended from the remnants of the old Empire) and the Resistance (the former Rebellion backed by the fledgling New Republic) are looking for him for very different reasons.  Thanks to Poe Dameron, the missing piece of the last Jedi's location is stored within a small BB-8 series droid.  The main conflict of the film is getting the little droid into the hands of the Resistance before he can be seized by the First Order.  Saying  too much more would give away more of the plot than I'm comfortable with.  This is a movie you should experience and not read about.

If you have read other sources, it may have been mentioned that there are several plot holes in TFA.  That's true.  There are.  But, I believe they're  there purposely.  Some items, Rey's origins being chief among them, are deliberately vague.  And, to anyone who has an issue with that I say this is only the first part of a trilogy.  I have every confidence that Disney and company will make all things clear and flesh everything out in 2017 and 2019.  And, speaking of Rey.  The path that Abrams is leading you down where this character is concerned is very obvious.  Or, is he pulling a big swerve on all of us?  There are several hints dropped throughout.  That and the causes of Luke's disappearance from the known galaxy should keep us all tingling with anticipation for the next two years.  In the interim, there is sure to be new theories daily by fandom on each of the lingering storylines.  Be prepared.

The Force Awakens is not perfect.  There are some rehashed occurrences that remind you of movies past.  Seriously, we have another Death Star-type superweapon.  You would think the First Order would learn from the mistakes of the Empire when it comes to defending it. Admittedly, that entire plot is a little tired.  The third time isn't necessarily the charm here. But, overall, TFA is a declaration the franchise has righted itself and is now back on the rails.  Think of it as the appetizer to the steak dinner that follows.  It's still savory in its own right, but, you know something better is coming.  Rejoice Star Wars fans.  The dragon is alive and well.  It's going to breathe some unbelievable fire!

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

****1/2 stars

Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Krampus

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
Krampus
 Released 12/4/15

I'm not big on tradition.  I tend to gravitate toward things that skewer it.  That's probably why I've continued to be a fan of South Park all these years.  It's likely why I get far more excited by Halloween than I do the more family oriented holidays of Thanksgiving and Christmas.  "Happy Happy" has just never had a lot of appeal to me.  There's nothing wrong with happy mind you, I just tend to like my entertainment with a sharper edge.  Guess that's the subversive nature in me. 

So, all of that said, is there any surprise that I love the concept of a Christmas horror movie?  When I first began seeing trailers for the Christmas gorefest, Krampus, my thoughts were "Oh, yeah, this is right up my alley!"  But, of course, like everything else, you have to take the good with the bad.  For every Gremlins, there's a Jack Frost.  And many a horror movie has looked great in a five minute trailer only to completely disappoint. I'm looking at you, Paranormal Activity.

So, what exactly is the Krampus?  In folklore, he's the polar opposite of Santa, a demonic entity who punishes children who have misbehaved during the Christmas season.  In this film, it's a child who has lost his faith in the holiday that summons this master of mayhem.

Max is a preteen who wants to still believe in the magic of  Christmas.  He still even writes letters to Santa.  But, it becomes increasingly hard to keep the Christmas spirit when you have the type of family Max has.  His immediate family isn't horrible, but, his parents (Adam Scott and Toni Collette) have begun drifting apart due to their busy schedules.  His sister is the typical cynical teenager. His grandmother is the only one who seems to get him these days.  She's the classic older-person-who-knows-more than-she-lets-on archetype.

While his immediate family isn't wretched (just very stressed), their holiday is about to change for the worst when the his aunt's (Allison Tolman) brood arrives December 22 planning to spend the holiday with them.  His aunt is well-meaning, if a bit frazzled.  Unfortunately, she's brought the rest of the family including her obnoxious "man's man" of a husband (David Koechner), his female cousins who would put fear into NFL linebackers, his male cousin who pretty much stares at everything and everyone as if he's catatonic, his newborn cousin, his aunt's and mom's caustic Aunt Dorothy (Conchata Ferrell), and their family bulldog. 

Everything comes to a head at dinner time when Max's cousins find his letter to Santa and read it aloud mocking him.  For Max, it's the final straw.  Destroying the letter and casting it to the wind outside, he unwittingly sets into motion events no one in the house will forget.  The Krampus has heard his anguish.  And, he's coming.

What struck me about Krampus is that it's a lot of fun.  The characters in the beginning are gloriously over the top.  You got a true sense of why Max's family is dreading the holiday.  It really is a comedy to start.  Max's mother making an elaborate, but, ultimately unappreciated meal for people who would prefer macaroni and hot dogs is priceless. David Koechner pulls everything from his "macho" bag as a father who so wishes his two girls were boys deep down. 

When the Krampus arrives, the movie does take a decided turn to the dark side.  But it still maintains a sense of humor and whimsy as the demon's will is carried out by a wide array of familiar Christmas minions including dark elves, murderous gingerbread men, possessed toys, and burrowing snow monsters.  Even Krampus himself appears as a grossly deformed Santa (almost as if he came directly out of The Ring with the distorted facial features). 

The film was written and directed by Michael Dougherty.  Horror fans may remember one of his previous outings, the cult favorite, Trick 'r Treat, from 2007.  This man does have a vivid imagination and an eye for whimsical massacre.  Through the chaos, he does try to deliver a message of tolerance and not letting others beat down your spirit.  The question is has Max, and the rest of his family for that matter, learned it too late?  You decide because just when you think Krampus has descended into sappiness, you're given a rather ambiguous WTH?  ending. 

Krampus is a wild ride through a Hellish funland of sorts with some nice, creepy special effects sequences.  I did call it a gorefest originally, but, that's not quite right.  Oh, it's macabre to be sure, but with its PG-13 rating, there aren't gushing gallons of blood spilled to alienate those who might be turned off by that sort of thing.  There's enough comedy to offset the film's dark nature for the non-horror set.  Give it shot.  You won't be sorry. 

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

***1/2 stars

Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Creed

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
Creed
 Released 11/26/15

Old boxing movies don't die.  They just get six sequels (and counting).  Creed, the latest entry in the Rocky saga, punched its way into the cinema over the Thanksgiving holiday this week.  Are you saying to yourself, "Uggh, another Rocky movie?"  I know I did when I first heard of it.  Then I saw the first trailer and thought, "Eh, maybe it has promise."  But, I wasn't holding much hope for that.  Strange for me, this series has been (in my best Yoda).  There were the classic Rocky and Rocky II (maybe not classic, but very good).  Then there was the glitzy silliness that was Rocky III.  Then we had the implausible, mock-worthy Rocky IV (a boon to American-Soviet relations).  Afterwards, we had the "What the Hell was that?" of Rocky V.  Finally, there was the solid, yet not classic Rocky Balboa of a few years ago.  So, Creed could have gone either way.

Creed is the story of Adonis Johnson (Michael B. Jordan), the illegitimate son of Rocky's rival-turned-friend, Apollo Creed.  When we first meet Adonis, he's a preteen in "Juvi" who has a penchant for fighting.  Bounced around several foster homes after his mother died, he's found and taken in by Apollo's widow (Phylicia Rashad) to live with her in the Los Angeles Creed mansion. 

Adonis grows up well and has a very good job as an adult, but, the lure of the ring is in his blood.  He fights on the side in cheap, dirty venues in Tijuana.  Mostly a self-taught fighter, he builds up an impressive record.  Deciding to box full-time, he quits his job and seeks a trainer in  the gym where his late father trained.  Rejected (after an unceremonious sparring session), he leaves for Philadelphia to seek out the one man who might be able to help him.  The man who had two epic fights against Apollo Creed. 

Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone) is living a quiet life in Philly after the events of the last film operating his restaurant named after his late wife.  When Adonis shows up at the restaurant speaking of events he shouldn't know anything about, Rocky's curiosity leads him to discover who the young fighter is.  Initially refusing to train Adonis, he later relents. 

In a parallel to the original Rocky, the world light heavyweight champion, "Pretty" Ricky Conlan needs an opponent to make one final splash in the sport before serving an extended prison sentence.  After Conlan's first opponent is injured, his manager contacts Rocky and Adonis to set up a "sure thing" for his champion fighter against the unproven young Creed.  And fight fans, I don't have to tell you where this leads, do I?

 Creed parallels Rocky in more ways than the inevitable final fight.  Aside from the ultimate underdog facing off against the far superior opponent, you have training sequences with chickens, a conflict that threatens to derail the underdog (maybe that's more Rocky II), and the cheesy obligatory final fight training montage.  And let's not forget the fight itself where both opponents are landing so many haymakers on each other they would rightfully be deader than Apollo inside of 30 seconds.

But, the movie has heart.  Michael B. Jordan is a very good young actor.  He needed something like this to cleanse the palette after the trainwreck that was Fantastic Four this Summer (the whole cast needs it).  And not just a small indie feature could fit the bill (unless there was Oscar consideration).  The project needed to be high profile.  A connection to Rocky fits the bill.  I believed him in the role.  He mimics Rocky's story, but put his own unique stamp on it.

The other big surprise was Sylvester Stallone himself.  This was a much better "Rocky as mentor" role than what we saw in Rocky V.  Maybe that had something to do with the differences between Jordan and Tommy Morrison as actors, but, I digress.  Stallone hasn't pulled off the "big lug"  charm this well since the first sequel in my opinion.  There was a progression in his character that felt natural for the first time in a long time.  Rocky is done inside the ring.  The audience has known it for a long time.  And for once, Stallone himself seems to know it.  It's a simple, understated role he fits into beautifully.  And, it's a lot more believable than the action-based parts he's taken in recent years.

In the end, Creed comes to a predictable conclusion if you have followed this series at all.  But, predictability doesn't mean boring or bad.  Good decisions were made in this film all around.  Jordan injects new energy which should last for at least one more sequel.  The character of Rocky Balboa stepping back into a supporting role is maybe the best decision of all.  Creed is by far the best "Rocky" movie since Rocky II. 

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

***3/4 stars

Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Spectre

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
     Spectre
Released 11/6/15

Director Sam Mendes returns for his second go 'round at James Bond with the release of this week's Spectre.  It's also the fourth installment featuring Daniel Craig as the famous (or infamous) spy.  Mendes and Craig worked some incredible magic with 2012's, Skyfall, to the tune of over a billion dollar take worldwide.  That's a hard act to follow, but, then again, Bond has never been more popular.

One thing Spectre does is bring the whole Daniel Craig Bond series full circle.  Now, I've never claimed to be a fan of 007 prior to Craig, but, I don't think the Bond series has been as tightly woven as the last four have been.  These stories aren't occurring in a vacuum.  Spectre cleverly ties the previous three chapters together.

Fulfilling the final wish of the deceased former M, Bond is on an unsanctioned mission in Mexico at the start of Spectre.  Stopping a plot to blow up a stadium (and killing two men in the process), Bond pursues Marco Sciarra who survives the attack.  In typical 007 fashion, the pursuit isn't subtle and Sciarra doesn't survive the melee.  But, Bond is able to take possession of Sciarra's ring that has the mysterious image of an octopus imprinted on it. 

Of course almost causing an international incident doesn't go over very well with Bond's boss, the current agent with the codename "M (Ralph Fiennes)"  There's a shakeup coming to the British Intelligence community spearheaded by "C", the head of the Joint Intelligence Service with whom M is in the midst of a contentious power struggle.  C wants to create an intelligence coalition  among nine countries (Nine Eyes).  Unfortunately, in his mind, the 00 program has become archaic and obsolete.  He's an advocate of shutting it down completely.  For fear of incurring more heat on the troubled program, M grounds Bond indefinitely.

Now you know a little thing like a suspension won't deter 007 from completing his mission.  Following various leads and using Sciarra's ring as an infiltration device, Bond is able to track down the organization Sciarra belonged to, a criminal enterprise calling itself "Spectre."  As he will come to learn, the organization has been manipulating events in his life since the events in Casino Royale.  The leader, Franz Oberhauser (Christoph Waltz), has a personal connection to Bond as well.  And, Oberhauser is not his real name.  His actual name might make some old school 007 fans giddy. 

Spectre is an entertaining film, but, for me, lacks a little of the nasty grittiness of the previous three Daniel Craig Bond movies.  It harkens back to (but not fully) some of the playful silliness of previous 007 efforts.  Longtime Bond fans will be happy that there is some gadgetry, women falling into bed with him for no apparent reason at all, over-the-top henchmen (Dave Bautista is great as Mr. Hinx), and silly sight gags (Bond landing on a soft couch after falling from a crumbling building will induce a groan or two).  Bond also doesn't seem to be as conflicted about his profession this fourth time around which was a dynamic to the Craig era I really liked. 

There's been some speculation that Spectre might be Craig's final Bond effort.  If this is true, the movie's ending does lend some credence to that conclusion, although it is still left open ended to a degree.  It also lends itself to a long-rumored speculation about the James Bond series itself which I'm sure many of you have heard.  You know the theory that James Bond isn't actually one man but a codename that has been used by several agents in MI-6?  When you see the ending of Spectre, you would think the franchise will likely need to be rebooted again if Craig doesn't reprise the role,  especially given some of the actors who have been rumored to be up for the role as the next Bond.  You have to admit, it would explain why the cars, gadgets, and types of threats he puts down have changed over the years.  And, why Craig's beginning in Casino Royale almost seemed like an origin story. 

Spectre gives longtime fans of Bond some needed touches with the past.  Personally, I didn't need that so, despite some wonderful performances by Christoph Waltz, Dave Bautista, and the steady, Craig, as Bond himself, Spectre didn't resonate with me as much as the previous three films.  It is, however, still well worth your time to give it a look.

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

***1/2 stars


Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Sinister 2

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
     Sinister 2
Released 8/21/15

If you've been reading this blog, you know how I feel about the first Sinister film.  It's a modern day horror classic.  It's the benchmark by which I compare all movies in this genre now.  I thought it was that good.  I was cautiously optimistic when news of a sequel was released.  Sure, who doesn't want to see the continuation of a great story.  But, I've seen the hatchet job (no offense to another great horror franchise) taken to horror sequels.  That's not saying it can't be done well.  I thought the Saw franchise was terrific through all seven chapters (I may be one of the few).  But, then there are sequels like Silent Hill: Revelation that just totally undo all the goodwill garnered by the original.  Being such a fan of the first film, I wanted so much for the former to be true.

For those unfamiliar with Sinister, it tells the story of a true crime author who knowingly moves his unknowing family into a house where another family was gruesomely murdered to complete his next book.  While doing research for the book, he discovers a mysterious box in the attic containing several Super 8 reel films depicting similar murders of different families all with innocuous titles such as "Family Hanging Out", "Pool Party", "Lawn Work", etc.  As the story unfolds, it is revealed that an evil entity is behind the deeds, a corruptor of innocence known as Bughuul (or "Mr. Boogie" by children). 

Sinister 2 picks up some unspecified time after the disturbing end of the first film.  We begin in the same fashion as the original seeing an unknown family dying horrifically at the hands of an unknown assailant.  It's revealed to be the nightmare of a young boy, Dylan, who is living in a rural, isolated farmhouse with his twin brother, Zach, and mother, Courtney (Shannon Sossamon).  It's later revealed they are in hiding from their abusive and well-connected father and husband, Clint. 

Strange things are happening to Dylan in his new home, not the least of which are the nightly visits from ghostly children led by Milo who continually show him Super 8 film reels of the vicious murders of their respective families.  It's all an effort to recruit Dylan for their malevolent master, the pagan deity, Bughuul.

Meanwhile, Deputy So & So (James Ransone and, yes, that is how he is known in the first movie) is trying to do his part to end the threat of Bughuul by burning down the houses where the demon-related murders have taken place.  Tracking Bughuul's "footprints", the now ex-deputy, has traced his influence to the current farmhouse inhabited by Courtney and her boys. 

The deputy arrives at the farmhouse to burn it down expecting it to be abandoned, but, he reluctantly becomes the protector for Courtney's family from both her husband and Bughuul who influenced murders at a small church on the farmhouse property.  However, when the deputy leaves temporarily to gather more intel, Courtney's husband strikes and forces his family to leave with him.  When the deputy returns he knows all too well what will happen next.  By leaving the murder house, the family is now officially marked for death by Bughuul.  The question is who is the demon attempting to corrupt to carry out the deed?  It may not be who you think.

What made Sinister great was the heaviness that film placed on the audience.  From reel one you have such a feeling that horrific events are to come.  There was just such an underlying feeling of...dread.  The atmosphere stunk of it.  It grabbed you and didn't let go.  And, it chilled you to the bone.  There aren't a lot of horror movies that can do that to me these days.  This one did.  No pretense.  It hit you like a hammer.

Sinister 2 offers the same type of atmosphere and attempted scares, but, it was different this time.  It wasn't close to being as meaningful as the first.  For me, the biggest weakness was there was no mystery in Sinister 2. 

Scott Derrickson, director of first movie, was a producer and writer on the sequel and handed the director's reigns to Ciaran Foy.  Both didn't quite hit the mark here of what made Sinister a classic.  Part of it was the mystery.  You didn't always know why things were happening the way they did and that is what added to the fear.  I know I've blasted some horror movies for not offering enough exposition for what is on screen.  More often than not, I've found many modern day movies in this genre leave me with a feeling of "What was that?" at the very end.  In the case of Sinister 2, there was a case of too much explanation.  In a way, it partly ruined the film for me.

For example, the ghostly children in the first movie were made creepier by the fact that they didn't talk.  They were just there and just there suddenly in some respects.  They weren't angry poltergeists that tossed the room they were in.  They just lurked.  From the beginning, Milo and the other ghosts kids in the sequel had their edge dulled as it was so obvious they were on a recruiting assignment and just drove home constantly that their mark had to watch every horrific movie reel.  Their methods also made little sense considering who they were trying to recruit.  I won't ruin it for you, but, you'll know what I mean when you watch.  Apparently, Dylan had to watch every family snuff reel before Bughuul would deem him ready to take out his own family.

These were explanations that I personally didn't need.  Sinister was the perfect one-off type of movie that really didn't need a follow up.  But, when you make $88 million on a $3 million budget, I guess the inevitable sequel will always come with territory.  I just wish all involved had taken the tact that less was more.  There's a fine line between phenomena that needs an answer and that which doesn't.  I can't tell you where that line is.  But, I know when it is reached.  Don't misunderstand.  There was nothing in Sinister 2 as egregious as the dead Highlanders going back to their home planet or midichlorians explaining the power behind the Force.  But, the creepy mystery behind part of the story is just gone.

This isn't to say Sinister 2 is a complete loss.  The parts of the movie that worked for me are the scenes involving Bughuul himself.  He still menacingly lurks in the background jumping out of photos, moving to the foreground on computer screens, etc.  We actually discover what it means to disappoint him which I thought was a nice touch.  The kills are brutal and shocking. 

Sinister 2 is not an awful movie, but, it is unnecessary.  There is enough here to say it's worth a look if you have seen the first and your curiosity gets the best of you.  But, it's worth a look on Redbox or Netflix.  I don't think I will ever sit down to watch this one again.  I will blissfully pretend only the first Sinister exists.  The sequel is clearly an example of not leaving well enough alone.  Hopefully, the box office results (which I hear are not good), will put an end to any future plans.  Mr. Boogie defies explanation.  Let it remain so.

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

*** stars


Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Fantastic Four

 Reviews from the Dark Side presents
    Fantastic Four
Released 8/7/15

We've all heard the stories and seen at least some of the reviews.  Let's address the 800-pound gorilla in the room.  No preamble.  No pomp and circumstance.

Director Josh Trank's reboot of Marvel's First Family is...decidedly mediocre.  It definitely doesn't deserve praise.  But, it didn't come from the bowels of Hades either.  It doesn't carry a quarter of the excitement of even the lowest film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.  But we have seen superhero wretchedness greater than this.  It's no Batman and Robin, Blade: Trinity, Ghost Rider:  Spirit of Vengeance, any Christopher Reeve Superman movie after Superman II,  or even the previous FF movies.  For me it's more along the lines of X-Men: The Last Stand, Daredevil, or even Elektra.  Just kind of "meh."

Rumor has it that Trank told his main cast not to read any Fantastic Four material while this movie was filming.  Big mistake.  Not so much for the actors, but, for Trank himself.  Like Tim Story before him, he doesn't quite get all of what should make the FF tick.  In some aspects, he did get some things half right.  He didn't imply the Power Cosmic was only in the Silver Surfer's board and he's powerless if separated from it, at least ( I will NEVER forgive that).   Galactus wasn't a giant cloud (another cringeworthy moment).  So, he had that going for him.

The film follows 5th grade science prodigy, Reed Richards, in the beginning.  Reed is pretty much stuck in his own little scientific world.  His parents and teachers don't understand him.  Surprisingly, he finds an ally and friend in classmate, Ben Grimm, when Reed raids the Grimm family's junkyard to find parts for his latest project, a teleporter. 

Flash forward seven years later and we find 19-20 year old Reed (Miles Teller) and Ben (Jamie Bell) at a science fair demonstrating a working model of the teleporter. After a successful (and destructive) demonstration, Reed is offered a scholarship by Dr. Franklin Storm (Reg E. Cathey) to join the Baxter Institute, a think tank of brilliant young scientists.  At the Institute, he meets Storm's adopted daughter, Susan (Kate Mara), a mathematical genius whose specialty is finding patterns.  He also meets Storm's hotheaded, drag racing, rebellious son, Johnny (Michael B. Jordan), "who can build anything", and the arrogant Latverian super genius, Victor Von Doom (Toby Kebbell).  Of particular note, an instant "friendly" rivalry begins between Reed and Victor as it's revealed Victor came up with the concept of the teleporter even before Reed.  Reed, however, was the first to build a working model of the device.

Reed, Victor, Johnny, and Sue succeed in building a large scale teleporter that can transport living matter to a strange, and, as it turns out, hostile parallel world eventually dubbed "Planet Zero."  When the government steps in with a plan to use NASA astronauts as the first humans to travel to Planet Zero, Reed, Johnny, and Victor decide to hijack the transporter themselves and be the first humans to set foot on the new world.  Reed doesn't forget his old buddy, Ben, and convinces him to come along with the trio to make history.  Sue is left out as she would never go for such a stunt with her by-the-book nature.  The four would-be adventures make a successful jump in the transporter.  While exploring the new world, disaster strikes as a strange pool of green energy bombards them.  Doom is lost in the melee (or is he).  Reed, Johnny, and Ben are irradiated before their pods in the transporter send them back to Earth.  Residual energy caught within the device's sphere washes over Sue, as well, when the pods come back.  Thus, legends are born.

  So, let's talk about the good.  It was a good call to tweak the origin story away from the outer space/cosmic ray bombardment that is the canon of the FF.  That doesn't really work any longer.  Interdimensional travel to find new resources for Earth's benefit still maintains that sci-fi element which is a staple of this superteam while making it relevant for the current millennium. 

I said earlier that Trank gets the Reed/Doom dynamic half right.  The conflict between the two is based on an intellectual rivalry.  It was a nice touch to make each genius equally responsible for the creation of the teleporter.  Add to that Doom's unrelenting arrogance and you have the makings for a huge antagonistic conflict.  This was something the previous Tim Story movies didn't broach successfully.

Now, we come to the bad.  When I said the Reed/Doom dynamic was half right, that means it's also half wrong.  For some strange reason, the film introduces a half-baked love triangle (sort of) between Reed, Doom, and Sue to create more discord among the two super geniuses.  Even though this is breaking protocol with canon, it might not have been a bad twist had there been any chemistry between any of the three actors.  There was definitely none between Doom and Sue (plus it was pretty much one-sided on Doom's part).  The casual flirtation between Reed and Sue was laughable.  If a sequel to this movie is greenlit, are we supposed to believe in any way these two will become lovers and eventually be married?  And, Sue was kind of a cold fish anyway, so why would either of the guys bother?

Speaking of chemistry, there wasn't much on display between the entire cast.  With the exception of some interactions between Reed and Ben, the actors seemed to interact because the script said they should.  In the Avengers, there was more warmth amongst the team and they pretty much hated each other until the end!  Reed and Ben are friends yes.  But, it would have been nice to see a little more explanation as to why this was so.    The history of their bond is Ben catches Reed in the family junkyard, Reed shows Ben his prototype transporter, and Ben pretty much goes along for the ride.  Not a bad start mind you, but again, you're not even sure why they became such good friends in the first place after this initial interaction.  I know there's only a limited amount of time to tell the story, but a little more in this area would have gone a long way.

Let's talk a little bit about Miles Teller as Reed Richards.  I know actors can be versatile enough to change depending on the roles they're given.  And, to his credit, Teller tones down his usual smart-ass, obnoxious frat boy persona in FF for the most part.  But, I still didn't quite buy him as one of the most brilliant minds on the planet.  I tried.  I really did.  I wanted to.  It just didn't work for me.

And, please can we stop this one thing from happening if another attempt with the FF is made?  Can we not directly tie Doom's origin in with the other four?  It's been done twice now.  It doesn't work.  I'm not sure what's wrong with sticking with the original storyline.  Doom's power comes from his own scientific genius.  It's an origin story that can run parallel with our four heroes, but, it doesn't have to be forcibly tied to them.  Doom's mystical prowess has never been explored in these movies either.  Maybe if Marvel has anything to say about it in the future, that part of the character can be explored.  The line between science and magic can be a blurry one.  Can you imagine the possibilities of tying Doom in to Dr. Strange or maybe even Thor at some point?

While this is an origin story, you expect the action to be toned down a bit in favor of a lot of set up.  At a running time of about 100 minutes, more than 60 is devoted to the set up.  This may be forgivable if the payoff was an eye opening smackdown to end the movie.  The final fight between the newly formed FF and mega-powered Doom is not only short, it's lackluster at best.  Number one, Doom, who earlier in the film is believed to have died on Planet Zero, is found to still be alive.  His ultimate goal is to suck the Earth into the Planet Zero dimension through a black hole.  That's fine.  It's what bad guys do.  What doesn't make sense is why he goes back to Earth in the first place to kill people and place everyone, including the FF on red alert, when all he's going to do is kill everyone anyway.  Why not just pull Earth into the new dimension so no one knows what's happening?  It's pretty much silly James Bond villain-type logic coming from one of the smartest people in any reality.  And, the final resolution to the battle is just as head-scratchingly bad as the one in Rise of the Silver Surfer.  One where you're not quite sure what the Hell happened before everyone stops throwing punches.

Then there's the special effects.  You know, in this day and age of CGI and Industrial Light and Magic, it's inexcusable for this aspect of any genre of movie that relies heavily on these items to be this cheesy awful unless it's intentionally done so for a laugh.  The Human Torch's effects fluctuate from being kind of cool to being as horrible as a '70s cartoon.  And the Thing?  Does it say something that I long for the days of Michael Chiklis's pudgy orange rock suit?  The Thing just looks awkward and laughable.  And are they implying that Ben Grimm's swinging bachelor days are over?  He always at least wore underpants.  Here, he's naked sans genitalia.  So tell me what's he supposed to do when Alicia Masters comes along?  The worst thing?  He doesn't seem to notice.  Now, maybe this is just the product of the film being PG-13, but, again, there's another 800-pound gorilla in the room that everyone in the film is ignoring. 

As far as the superhero genre is concerned, you can do worse than this rendition of Fantastic Four.  You can do a lot better, too.  For all its flaws, it is getting a bit of an unfair rap critically.  That's not to say the movie is worth more than a Red Box or Netflix viewing.  The bottom line is after three attempts (four if you count the Roger Corman effort that was never supposed to see the light of day), 20th Century Fox has proven they have no clue how to make Marvel's First Family relevant or, at the very least, entertaining.  The time has come for Fox to either give the property back to Marvel Studios or to come to an agreement with them as Sony has done with Spider-Man.  I know many say the FF just doesn't translate well to the big screen and is just out of touch with today's audience.  I refuse to believe that.  If Marvel gets their hands back on the property, how can you say the magic can't be captured?  Look at what Marvel Studios did with a group of D-List characters last year in Guardians of the Galaxy.  Look at what was done this year with Ant-Man.  Did everyone hear that?  Ant-Man!  Look at what was done with Daredevil.  You go from the mediocre Ben Affleck effort to one the most talked about and highly regarded episodic series' on TV/Netflix.  There are just too many examples of what can be done when a story is placed in the right hands to write these characters off completely.  All it takes is the right combination of writers, director, and cast.  It may not be easy, but, it can be done.  Here's hoping the cold war between Fox and Disney comes to an end.

I wish I had a rating between two and half and two and three quarters, but...

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

**1/2 stars


Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Ant-Man

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
   Ant-Man
Released 7/17/15


Ant-Man.  Ant-Man.  Ant-Man?  When I first heard Marvel Studios was going through with the  development of a feature length film on this character a year ago, my jaw dropped.  Ant-Man was an integral part of the formation of the Marvel Universe from its comic roots, but, even there, over the years the character and his alter ego, Hank Pym, hasn't been a big to do for many years.  And then, there's the concept of Ant-Man.  Who wants to watch a two-hour movie of a hero who basically only shrinks and communicates with insects?  What was Marvel thinking on this one?  There was a reason this character was left out of the Avengers movie despite the fact that comic book-wise, he was a founding member of the team, right?  No one except maybe the staunchest loyalists cares about Ant-Man. 

I had that thought until I saw Marvel Studios release of Guardians of the Galaxy last year.  I didn't expect much out of that film either and it blew me away.  I almost chose it as the best movie of 2014.  In most years it would have been the best movie by far.  If Marvel could strike gold with a group of, at best, C-list heroes with the Guardians, should I really doubt they could make Ant-Man a cool character on screen?  Could lightning strike twice, or is Marvel starting to feel themselves a little bit too much based on their huge success over last several years? 

And the verdict is, if Marvel wants to do a feature film on Peter Porker, the Spectacular Spider-Ham, I will be at the theater at midnight screaming, "Please, take my money!"  I don't know how it was done, but a character that I was always lukewarm about, at best, was made to be amazing on the big screen.  This movie could have very easily dove into the deep end on cheesy and it didn't come close. Like Guardians of the Galaxy, Ant-Man hits you with equal doses of humor and action that maybe shouldn't work as well as it does, but, it gives you an incredible entertainment experience.  Give all credit to cast and crew on this one. 

The film starts with what I'm sure was a small measured experiment on the studio's part with a pre-credit scene.  Scientist, adventurer, and soldier (to some degree), Hank Pym (Michael Douglas), vehemently resigns from S.H.I.E.L.D. in 1989 after learning the organization has attempted to replicate his shrinking technology.  Believing it to be too dangerous he vows to never let the espionage group or anyone else get their hands on it.  Some familiar names are in this scene with Pym including an older Peggy Carter and Howard Stark.  Pym seems to be especially distrustful of Stark. 

In the present day, good-hearted thief, Scott Lang (Paul Rudd), is released from prison.  Wishing not to return to his old criminal life, but, desperate to provide for his young daughter, he's forced into accompanying a former associate and his cohorts to steal from a giant safe located in the home of none other than Hank Pym.  Successfully (and creatively)breaking into the safe, Lang doesn't find money, jewels, or anything seemingly valuable.  All he finds is a strange helmet and leather suit which he takes anyway.

 Little does Lang or his associates know, this whole scenario, including dropping the information about the safe, was all manipulated by Pym.  Hank followed Scott's last highly publicized heist which landed him in prison.  He needs Scott's skills for a heist of his own he's planning.  Hank's former protégé, Darren Cross (Corey Stoll), has solved the riddle of the shrinking tech for a weaponized suit of armor that Cross calls "Yellowjacket."  Knowing his former colleague was already a bit unstable, Hank has his somewhat estranged daughter, Hope (Evangeline Lilly), in place within his organization to monitor his progress and deteriorating mental stability due to use of the shrinking process.  He needs Scott to steal the Yellowjacket armor before Cross can sell it to any unsavory types.  But first, he needs to teach the thief how to use the shrinking tech on the suit he stole, a suit that can be used to control his own private army.  An army of...ants!

As previously stated, there is a fair amount of humor injected in Ant-Man.  There would almost have to be considering that Paul Rudd is the lead.  In addition to the comedy, Rudd is able to pull off dramatic heft when the script calls for it.  And, it was comforting that he took the role very seriously despite the subject matter.  He got in tremendous shape for the role. 

The remainder of the cast does a more than credible job supporting Rudd, although I will say that Darren Cross is a bit of an anti-climactic villain.  Oh, there was nothing wrong with Corey Stoll or his performance.  It's just that in the scale of villains of epic scope in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, we've had Loki, Ultron, Ronan, glimpses of Thanos, and now, Yellowjacket? 

The film firmly entrenches Ant-Man in the MCU.  I wondered why Marvel chose Ant-Man of all their upcoming projects to follow Age of Ultron and now I'm beginning to understand why.  The film drops a few subtle and not so subtle hints to what promises to be next year's epic Civil War movie.  I mentioned before that Hank Pym wasn't eager for Howard Stark to possibly get his hands on his technology.  Scott even suggests at one point that they should call in the Avengers for assistance, a suggestion Pym also didn't warm to.  If the architect of the events of AofU were publicized, you can imagine Hank's distrust of the Starks has only increased.  We might at least have a clue as to where Ant-Man will stand during the Civil War.

Some other things for the geeks to, well, geek out on.  There's the mention of "a guy who can walk on walls."  I think we all know who this is a reference to.  We learn that an old Stark Industries warehouse is now the Avengers new compound.  There's a brief, but exciting fight between Ant-Man and the Falcon that showcases both heroes' abilities nicely.

Speaking of fighting, remember how I said that all involved actually made a shrinking hero cool?  Through his constant size changing and martial arts skills taught to him by Hope, Scott has a rather unique fighting style that would make him a tough opponent.  Yes, I did just say that about Ant-Man.  I don't believe I just said it either.

While there have been better movies that have come out of the MCU, Ant-Man is a more than solid entry into it.  I know some may find it a throw away movie sight unseen, but, I encourage all to take the time for one sitting.  The CGI on the ants alone is worth a sitting.  Ant-Man should not be casually dismissed.

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

***3/4 stars


Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Spy

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
   Spy
Released 6/5/15

When you have certain director/star collaborations, they can work magic on a movie screen.  There's Scorsese/DeNiro.  There's Coppola/Pacino.  And most recently...Feig/McCarthy?  This week's release of the action comedy, Spy, marks the third collaboration of director, Paul Feig and actress, Melissa McCarthy.  The duo has struck gold twice with the uproarious comedies, Bridesmaids and The Heat.  Could they hit a trifecta with Spy?  McCarthy has had a couple of critical turkeys in recent years, so it wouldn't hurt to have another win.

In this espionage spoof, Susan Cooper (McCarthy) is a CIA office grunt assigned to be the eyes and ears of one of agency's premiere field agents, Bradley Fine (Jude Law).  In pursuit of a suitcase nuke, Fine kills his target through a freak accident.  Unfortunately, the target was the only person who knew the location of the bomb. 

Back in the U.S., Fine is soon sent on another quest to find the suitcase when the CIA learns it could be with the target's daughter (Rose Byrne).  The mission ends tragically for Fine prompting Cooper(feeling guilty about not being able to save Fine) to request her first field assignment to track the suitcase when it's learned that all field agents' identities could be compromised. With no prior field experience, the Director (Allison Janney) is reluctant to send Cooper on the mission, but, she's out of options.  Fortunately, Cooper is surprisingly adept at combat as evidenced by her agency training videos.  So, the Director caves and sends her into the field much to the chagrin of boisterous agent, Rick Ford (Jason Statham), who believes she is nothing but a liability.  It's too bad that he's a bit of a bumbling idiot himself. 

Spy is a riot from almost the first frame and is an excellent send up of the espionage genre.  It's not as playfully goofy as the Austin Powers series, but it has its tongue firmly planted in its cheek with some of its more absurd moments.  I suggest putting your drink down when Fine accidentally kills the target in the movie's opening moments.  Both the suddenness and silliness of the scene will make you choke and ask "Did that just happen?"  There's also a fair amount of brutality in Spy as well.  There are a couple of absolutely gruesome slayings in the film.  But, they're usually followed by something ludicrous so you don't have a lot of time to dwell on them. 

This is a film where all of the performances just click with each other like a well oiled machine.  Law is the adept, if somewhat clueless, James Bond type.  Cooper clearly has a thing for him which he just doesn't see, and he continues to treat her like one of the guys.  Statham is the blustery, arrogant malcontent who isn't nearly as good as he thinks he is.  Who knew that he could be intentionally funny?  Although to be fair, he is still playing his usual Jason Statham role only with a comedic bent.

Other notable performances include Miranda Hart as Susan's dittery co-worker, Nancy.  And, then there's Aldo (Peter Serafinowic), the amorous British field agent (who pretends he's Italian) who wants to bed every woman he sees, including Susan.  She's pretty much groped by him at some point in many of the scenes they're in together. 

And, then there's Melissa McCarthy herself.  Paul Feig brings out the best in her.  I'm not sure what magic they have together, but, they need to keep collaborating because they give you something special every time.  In addition to her usual comedic talents, McCarthy adds a certain amount of sadness to Susan's character as no one takes her seriously due to her outward appearance.  And, let us not forget what has become a staple for her in most of her recent movies.  She has a couple of incredibly foul-mouthed tirades.  Some comedians can't pull this off without being overbearing.  She's one of the ones who can and still come off as likable. 

Spy is a return to inspired lunacy for McCarthy whose major starring vehicle last year, Tammy, didn't quite seem to be up to her normal standard.  It has surprisingly good action sequences (Melissa McCarthy action hero?) and the comedy is high quality as well.  Oh, and let me leave with this.  Stay through the end credits for a brief comic exchange between McCarthy and Statham.  It's a hoot to say the least.

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

**** stars

 Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good


   

Avengers: Age of Ultron

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
  Avengers:  Age of Ultron
Released 5/1/15

It's May 1, 2015.  Mark this date.  The Avengers have re-assembled!  You remember them right?  The dysfunctional superhero team who set box office records and made an insane amount of cash for Marvel Studios and Disney back in 2012?  Well, three short (or long) years later, they're baaaaack!  The Summer movie season gets the biggest kickoff you can ask for as Robert Downey, Jr., Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth, Mark Ruffalo, Scarlett Johansson, and Jeremy Renner return as the heroes who fight each other as much as they fight the bad guys.  Joss Whedon also returns as the mad scientist in the director's chair. 

What have our erstwhile do-gooders been up to since they were together a few years ago?  Well, if you are following the Marvel Cinematic Universe, you already know from Iron Man 3, Thor:  The Dark World, and Captain America:  The Winter Soldier.  And, if you haven't seen these films, you may be a little lost in some of the themes and characters of Age of Ultron.  It's not impossible to get up to speed, mind you, it is a superhero movie and not necessarily deep.  But, keep in mind, Whedon did not make this movie for the casual fan.  You leap in with both feet from minute one as he assumes you're familiar with everything up to the opening frame, even from the Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. television series.  So, my advice?  Have a geek buddy handy to fill in the blanks for you as you are watching.

AoU begins with a bang as the reunited team storms the compound of HYDRA agent, Baron Wolfgang von Strucker.  The objective is to reacquire the scepter used by Loki in the first film that has fallen in the terrorist organization's hands.  Although successful in their endeavor, Iron Man (Downey) is shaken to his core by Wanda Maximoff (Elizabeth Olsen), one of the super-powered twins controlled by von Strucker.  With the ability manipulate minds, she forces Tony Stark to see a possible scenario where the Avengers lay dead and he is the only member left alive.  Still already reeling from the events of the first Avengers movie, this image pushes Stark over the edge as he now believes he needs to create a solution to fashion a "suit of armor around the world."  To that end, unknown to his teammates with the exception of Bruce Banner (Ruffalo), he uses the power of Loki's scepter to give life to a defensive protocol he has been developing, Ultron. 

The Ultron program is imbued with artificial intelligence.  To Stark and the Avengers' chagrin, it becomes murderous when it becomes self aware setting off a conflict that will take the team around the world to prevent Ultron from completing its plans to eradicate the "threat" of humankind. 

First, let me say the film is visually magnificent.  It's a all out assault on the senses, but in the best way possible.  It was a good idea to take the conflict global this time.  The one thing about many superhero movies and many comic books themselves are limited to one locale.  There's nothing wrong with that.  But global conflict feels epic in scope.  And, this is what the Avengers should feel like.  Epic on the largest scale possible.  It was a very good decision by Whedon.

AoU also sets the stage for several important stories to come.  The Avengers remain a dysfunctional family, but some fundamental differences between the members become more acute, particularly between Iron Man and Captain America.  As in the first movie, these two eventually come together, but, they are very different in their philosophies on how to protect the Earth.  Iron Man is a problem solver who is always tinkering to eliminate a threat before it rears its ugly head.  Cap is a defender who believes you can't pre-eliminate threats without stamping on freedom.  This among other differences will cause them to oppose each other in next year's Civil War. 

As for other plot threads, Thor knows something awful is on its way, he just doesn't quite know the identity of the big bad just yet.  It's a thread that will surely extend into his next film and beyond in the upcoming Infinity War movies.  Ground was laid for the upcoming Black Panther film as the African nation, Wakanda, was introduced for the first time.  And, then there's the Hulk.  Can he ever catch a break?  Well, he almost does with the Black Widow, but he manages to screw that up, too.  You'll just have to watch for yourself.

If I have one complaint about AoU, it's a bit with Ultron it/himself.  Oh, it's not because the robot isn't a credible villain per se.  I liked James Spader's take as the voice of Ultron very much.  I like that Whedon wrote the character with the trademark "Stark Snark" which only makes sense considering who created him.  But, it's Ultron's motivations that were a bit muddled to me at times.  Granted there was a limited amount of time to develop those motivations, but, you were never quite sure why he was so disgusted by humanity, or, at least I wasn't in the beginning.  It felt more or less like he was the obligatory villain the Avengers are meant to knock down.  And, why is he so mad at his "father", Tony Stark?  All Tony tried to do was give him awareness and purpose.  Did Loki's scepter make him murderously evil? 

AoU is a spectacle.  I've read some complaints that it's overstuffed.  It may be just a bit.  Whedon throws a lot at you in a little under 2.5 hours.  I don't often say this about a movie, but, this one may have been better served had it been 10-20 minutes longer.  That said, there's no denying it's as much fun as anything you will see this year.  With larger than life characters, wall-to-wall action, and multiple future plotlines, how could it be anything but a blast?  And, lest I forget, in addition to the Maximoff twins, we get the first appearance on film of the Vision.  If you're a fan of Avengers lore, how can this movie not geek you out to some degree?

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

**** 1/2 stars

 Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good

Run All Night

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
  Run All Night
Released 3/13/15

Hello, loyal followers.  It's been awhile.  In fact, this is the first formal review since December's The Hobbit:  The Battle of the Five Armies.  So, a special movie would have to bring me out of hibernation.  Well, maybe not a special one, but, one that made me feel something.  And, that honor goes to the latest Liam Neeson action-thriller, Run All Night.

What is it about Neeson that makes him a believable action star at this stage of his career?  I have a few theories on that.  One, he comes across as an everyman and not a superman in his films.  I'm not saying he doesn't do the fantastic at times, but, the things he does feel like things you or I could do given proper training and motivation (like bullets hurtling toward you rapidly).  Two, he gives a good beating, but, he takes one, too.  His characters don't leave completely unscathed so, there's a bit of realism (as real as these movies can be).  Third, he's not a formerly jacked-up star who looks completely old and ridiculous doing these movies now.  You know the ones I'm talking about!  He's a big guy, but not a musclehead, an older actor, but not an ancient-looking one.  Lastly, there aren't many groan-inducing one-liners from Neeson.  Any humor he exudes is usually coincidental.  He just has a crazy cool manner of speech that doesn't cause involuntary cringes. 

That's not to say that all of Neeson's films are stellar.  A Walk Among the Tombstones was only mildly entertaining.  The Taken series hasn't produced a credible effort since the first installment (some would even debate that one, but I liked it).  Where does this latest effort fall in the spectrum?

Jimmy Conlon (Neeson) is the semi-retired muscle for criminal-turned-legitimate businessman, Shawn Maguire (Ed Harris).  Jimmy has killed more people than most diseases in the name of his best, and, seemingly only friend, Shawn, over the years.  Now past his prime, Jimmy has descended into a life of alcohol and deep regrets, his deepest being the broken relationship with his son, Michael (Joel Kinnaman). 

Michael, a limousine driver, is witness to a homicide committed by Shawn's son, Daniel, making Michael a target.  With the unsolicited assistance of his father, Michael's life becomes more complicated as both Conlon's must survive the night escaping Shawn's henchmen, a murderous assassin who has a particular dislike for Jimmy, and corrupt police. 

Run All Night is a fairly standard thriller with all the usual clichés regarding bad father-son relationships and misplaced retribution.   Neeson's character is set up to be a kind of antihero, but, it's hard to see him this way as he has very few redeemable qualities.  Fatherly concern for his son's well being doesn't necessarily make up for a lifetime of wicked deeds.  But, the film does a good job creating a dark, stylish world with a brutal code of justice.  Blood for blood is the theme.  It doesn't matter who is in the right and who is in the wrong.  It just is what it is.

Neeson and Harris pull the film along through it's almost two-hour run time.  Their dedicated performances are what makes a rather mundane plot worth sitting through.  Run All Night is the equivalent of the best fried food.  It's greasy and not very good for you, but leaves you extremely satisfied in the end. 

Now, how's that for a metaphor?

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

***1/4 stars

Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Good viewing. Much better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. Could possibly foot the price of a non-Matinee.
5 *= Pure eye candy. Hall of Fame material here.

2015- The Best (and Worst) of the Rest

Kingsman:  The Secret Service- Director, Matthew Vaughn's, adaptation of the comic book series is an homage to martial arts, acrobatics, and gun fu.  The action spy comedy follows a secret group of highly trained British special agents who are a relative secret to the world (even other spy agencies) on a quest to stop a billionaire megalomaniac attempting to cull the Earth's population.  The film has been described as Tarantino meets Bond.  I'm not sure about the Tarantino part (although there are literally dozens of exploding heads that's actually played as comedy).  And, listening to Samuel L. Jackson speak with a lisp is worth the price of your ticket in and of itself.  But, above all, the one word I would use to describe Kingsman?  Fun!  Colin Firth, Michael Caine, and Mark Strong co-star.
***3/4 stars

Fifty Shades of Grey- Part one of the adaptation of author, E.L. James', erotic romance is fairly equivalent to watching softcore porn at times.  College student, Anastasia Steele, embarks on a  sadomasochistic relationship with young, billionaire entrepreneur, Christian Grey after he is uncharacteristically taken with her during an interview.  Christian has some weird proclivities that were learned at an early age and, Anastasia, though reluctant at first, gives in to the intense young man's desires.  Conflict arises when Ana wishes for more normal intimacy which the billionaire is incapable of giving.  I watched this film vaguely interested in what perverse activities Christian would talk her into next, but this first installment is primarily all set-up for what's to come.  And, let's hope there is more of a point to this twisted romance in the next two chapters.  Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson star.
**3/4 stars

The Lazarus Effect- There are few things that can be more frustrating than a movie that almost gets it.  And, that's the feeling I had here.  This is the story of a group of college scientists who develop a serum for restoring the dead.  Apparently no one ever taught them to not play with dead things as circumstances go horribly wrong when one of them is accidentally killed and brought back by said serum.  Lazarus gets big points for being creepy, but it fails in telling a coherent story.  Was the antagonist truly evil?  Did the experience make her this way?  Was she corrupted by an evil force?  All are possibilities without any true acknowledgement of why these events happened.  Olivia Wild and Evan Peters star.
**3/4 stars

Justice League:  Throne of Atlantis- DC animation brings back the god-like heroes of the comic book giant's greatest super team.  This time they're on a mission to stop the invasion of the surface world by the undersea nation of Atlantis.  A reclusive stranger with strange aquatic powers may be the key to it all.  This is another great effort from DC/Warner Brothers.  The feature has drama, timely humor (Nathan Fillion has some great one-liners as the voice of Green Lantern), and non-stop action.  This is a superhero feature, but, it's definitely not for the kids in some areas as there are a few brutal deaths and some language you don't often hear in animated films.
**** stars

It Follows- This horror film directed by David Mitchell is more a symbolic caution against the spread of STDs than it is classic horror.  After a sexual encounter with her mysterious new boyfriend, a teenager is cursed and must avoid a murderous entity that can take the physical form of any man or woman it wants before it kills her.  But, she just may stay alive if she has sex with someone else to pass on the curse.  Let's forget for a minute how lousy this would be to do to another human being.  There are so many inconsistencies with this movie.  The teenager does sleep with someone else.  Actually, multiple someone elses and she's still cursed.  We never know what "it" is or why it wants everyone dead.  It Follows is a jumble of some interesting ideas set among some truly creepy imagery that never quite comes together into something coherent.  Maybe that was the point.  I didn't get it.
**1/2 stars

Get Hard- Take two out-of-their-mind comedians and mix in a ridiculous plot and you have Get Hard, the new comedy starring Will Farrell and Kevin Hart.  James King (Farrell) is a wealthy hedge fund manager who is falsely accused of fraud and embezzlement.  Convicted and sentenced to serve hard time in Federal prison, King is given 30 days to take care of his affairs before serving his time.  Desperate, he turns to his car washer, Darnell (Hart), to teach him how to "get hard."  Unfortunately, Darnell is about as far from being a "gangsta'" as he is.  This film is not sophisticated.  It's juvenile.  What did you expect from these two?  And, you know what else it is?  Very funny.
***1/4 stars

Home Sweet Hell- A henpecked furniture salesman (Patrick Wilson) gets in deep trouble when he has an affair with his sexy new employee (Jordana Brewster).  When his controlled, robotic wife (Katherine Heigl) discovers the affair, she doesn't react quite the way he expects.  This is a quirky little dark comedy that made me chuckle more than a few times.  I've often criticized Heigl for playing the same character over and over ad nauseam, so I should give her some credit for breaking character type here.  Although personality wise, I'm not sure she's doing a lot of acting here.
*** 1/4 stars

Unfriended- Horror invades the cyber age as six teenage friends may pay the ultimate price for a former friend's suicide.  Each has something to hide from the others, something they've never told a soul about.  So, how does a mysterious hacker know so much about them when he/she invades their online conversation?   Unfriended is a unique film as it takes place the entirety of its 80 minutes during an online phone conversation.  It's also unique in how much it plays with your head in such a limited venue.  The suspense slowly builds and gets ramped to 11 in its final 30 minutes.  This is one of the better efforts in the genre in the last few years.  It's a very simple, but, cringe worthy tale of revenge and cyber bullying.
***3/4 stars

True Story- Ironically, True Story is based on a true story.  Based on the memoir of journalist, Mike Finkel, the film follows family man, Christian Longo (James Franco), who is tracked down in Cancun for the murder of his wife and three children.  For mysterious reasons, Longo is using the alias of Mike Finkel when he is caught, prompting the disgraced New York Times journalist (Jonah Hill) to learn why.  What unfolds is a strange game of did he or didn't he actually commit the grisly murders as Finkel is increasingly drawn in by the affable Longo.  The two leads, particularly Franco, give more than credible performances.  The ending left me a little disappointed.  I guess I was expecting a classic Hollywood twist which didn't come.  Well, it is based on a true story so it was probably good that the ending wasn't embellished, but, I still felt I was missing something.
*** stars

The Voices- Jerry (Ryan Reynolds) is a lovable loser working in the shipping department of a bathtub factory.  He's harmless enough.  He's a chipper and neurotic type of guy who is harboring a huge crush for his co-worker, Fiona (Gemma Arterton).  But, Jerry has a secret.  He's a schizophrenic who hears voices, particularly those of his benevolent and trustworthy pooch, Bosco, and his evil, murderous cat, Mr. Whiskers.  When an unfortunate accident befalls Fiona while she's out with Jerry, he begins to lose his tentative grip on reality.  The Voices is billed as a black comedy, but, I think a huge opportunity was missed here.  Unlike another black comedy, Home Sweet Hell, this one took itself a little too seriously at times for me to call it comedy.  While there are a couple of funny exchanges between Jerry and his pets, the humor just didn't flow naturally for me and seemed a bit forced.  And, there were parts of the film that were just plain weird.  Anna Kendrick co-stars. 
**1/2 stars

The Wedding Ringer- This paint-by-the-numbers comedy stars Kevin Hart as a professional best man meaning he's hired by desperate grooms who have no friends of their own to stand up at their weddings.  Yes, I know it starts with an idiotic premise, but, don't most comedies?  One such groom (Josh Gadd) hires Hart and insanity ensues.  Of course, you know the two con men have to go to ridiculous lengths to cover their whopper of a lie with the bride and her family.  Of course, the two form a bond by the end that they really have no business forming.  It's not that the Wedding Ringer is bad, but, it's not a special comedy either.  Hart and his manic riffs are mildly entertaining, but, there isn't much here that blows you away.  Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting co-stars.
**3/4 stars

Taken 3- Liam Neeson returns as covert agent Bryan Mills in the third installment of the popular action franchise.  This time, Mills is framed for the murder of his ex-wife (Famke Janson).  So, you know that means there's a lot of headbusting to follow as he attempts to solve the mystery.  It's an obvious cash grab by the studio and even Neeson himself to milk every last nickel out of this franchise.  If you want to see Neeson beat every bad guy within an inch of his life and beyond yet again, Taken 3 is there for you.  Hopefully, this is a franchise that will now be put to bed, but, somehow I doubt it.  If you make it, audiences will come.
**3/4 stars 

Mad Max:  Fury Road- The apocalyptic hero from the Outback returns in George Miller's action slugfest.  This time Tom Hardy takes over the titular role from Mel Gibson.  Max gives an assist to a defecting warrior-with-a-secret agenda from a tyrant's army.  Of course, since this is a Mad Max movie, there is no shortage of savage car battles.  In fact, the violence is almost like a demented ballet of chaos.  The film is beautifully photographed and that alone would be a reason to shell out coin for a viewing.  I've never been a Max fan, but, I liked this.  If wall-to-wall action is your thing, you will, too.  What a lovely day!  Charlize Theron and Nicholas Hoult co-star. 
***1/4 stars

Mortdecai- Well, you knew it probably wasn't going to last.  After a departure from crazy in last year's Transcendence, Johnny Depp is back to being a weird lunatic in the comedy caper, Mortdecai. Depp is unscrupulous art dealer, Lord Charlie Mortdecai.  He becomes embroiled in a plot to steal a rare Goya painting involving terrorists, law enforcement, and all manners of thugs and thieves.  Depp is just strange as the titular character, slightly amusing at times like the film itself is in general.  The best parts of the movie by far involve Charlie's long-suffering manservant/bodyguard, Jock (Paul Bettany) and the involuntary gag reflex of his wife, Johanna (Gwyneth Paltrow), showing her disapproval of his new mustache.  Ewan McGregor co-stars. 
*** stars

The Boy Next Door- This is the movie equivalent of comfort food.  You know exactly what you're getting.  It may not be particularly good for you, but, it goes down easy enough.  You've seen this movie before.  Vulnerable, separated woman sleeps with seemingly wonderful-in-every-way guy who turns out to be a complete psychopath.  Psychopath then threatens everyone she loves when she breaks it off with him.  News at 11.  Not a bad movie.  Just one you've seen over and over again in your local theater.  Or, at least ID TV.  Jennifer Lopez stars.
**3/4 stars 

Hot Tub Time Machine 2- The sequel to the 2010 comedy that you demanded, right?  Rob Corddry, Craig Robinson, and Clark Duke return for part 2.  The plot (if you want to call it that)?  The trio (who has found untold success exploiting the time machine) travel through time to prevent a murder within the group.  It's hard to make time travel make sense, and this film doesn't try particularly hard to do so.  That's not the point of this silliness.  The point is the silliness itself as these three riff through the movie with sophomoric jokes and ridiculous exploits.  Take it for what it is and you can enjoy it on some level.  Expect anything thought provoking, and it'll be one of the worst movies you've ever seen.  You decide.  I was amused for the most part.
*** stars

Poltergeist- This remake of the 1982 horror classic is big on special effects.  They are absolutely first class.  The remake attempts to provide a few new twists on the original plot, but falls short.  Maybe it's the fact that you already know this story, or, maybe it's the fact the film seems to be rushed to get to the next great effect, but the plotting will leave you a little flat.  Still, it's worth a rental for the great CGI.
*** stars

Blackhat- Chris Hemsworth is an imprisoned computer hacker released from incarceration to aid both the U.S. and Chinese governments in tracking a mysterious "blackhat" hacker who has taken control of both a Chinese nuclear plant and the stock exchange in this techno thriller from Michael Mann.  The subject matter is timely considering the sophistication of today's technology and the advanced skills of computer experts.  The problem with a film like this is a thriller that depends so much on computer screens and explaining what is on those screens for its narrative isn't very thrilling to watch.  I was a little bored by Blackhat. 
**1/2 stars

The Cobbler- The Cobbler represents a step up from the usual Adam Sandler comedy of crassness and stupidity (which I have liked on more than one occasion).  He plays local New York cobbler and overall good-hearted schlub, Max Simpkin, who discovers that a generations-old shoe stitching machine allows him to assume the appearance of whoever's shoes it repairs.  It's a magical type of movie made a bit in the same manner as an earlier Sandler movie, Click.  Sandler's character learns a life lesson in this film just as he does in Click.  It's nice to see Sandler tone down the buffoonery on occasion because he actually isn't a bad actor.  The Cobbler isn't the greatest movie ever made, but it is enjoyable. 
*** stars

Everly- Have you ever dreamed of Salma Hayek taking down a plethora of armed thugs and assassins?  If so, this is the movie for you.  Hayek is Everly, the favorite prostitute "owned" by an Asian crimelord.  When she betrays her boss, he sends every manner of criminal after her to make her pay.  Everly isn't big on plot and the assassins border on the comical at times.  But, if you don't mind  watching sweaty, blood-covered Salma Hayek and a handful of gruesome deaths, there are worse ways to spend an afternoon.
*** stars

Wild Card- Jason Statham is Nick Wild, a recovering gambling addict and "security consultant" in Las Vegas, who runs afoul of a sadistic gangster when he helps a friend in her quest for revenge against said gangster.  Wild Card attempts to have a little more dramatic heft compared to many of Statham's other films as it tries to depict Wild battling his demons.  But, never fear action aficionados, there is also the signature bone breaking and skull cracking that you come to expect from a Statham film.  It's not a remarkable movie, but, watching Statham dispose of thugs with kitchen utensils has an entertainment value all its own.
*** stars

Black or White- Kevin Costner and Octavia Spencer are feuding grandparents fighting for custody of their granddaughter in this family drama.  Race relations come to the forefront, but, I don't feel the film beats you over the head with it as many movies of this nature do.  In the end, it's much more than race that determines what a parent is.  The ending is a satisfying one. 
***1/4 stars

The Intruders- Tell me if you've heard this one before.  New family who has been through some trying times moves to a new house for a fresh start.  Said new house has a dark history.  One family member notices strange happenings in the house and no one believes family member until it is too late.  It's an age old tale that will probably be retold countless more times.  Sometimes it's told with new twists that grab your attention.  This wasn't one of those times.  Miranda Cosgrove and Donal Logue star.
** 1/4 stars

Avenged- A young, deaf mute woman driving through the Southwest runs into a group of racist roughnecks who rape and murder her.  Through an arcane Native American ritual, she's returned from the dead to exact vengeance.  Avenged is not the greatest movie by any means, but there is something satisfying in seeing the truly despicable get what's coming to them.  Plus, I'm a big fan of revenge-themed movies.
*** stars

The Barber- A rogue detective goes deep undercover to catch a serial killer that has eluded authorities, including his departed father, for over a decade.  That's the premise to this cat-and-mouse thriller.  But, is the young detective really trying to catch the killer or become his apprentice?  And, is the kind, upstanding neighborhood barber exactly what he seems or does he have the mind of a psychopath?  It's a taut thriller with a nice twist ending.  Scott Glenn stars.
***1/4 stars

Insurgent- Part 2 of the cinematic adaptation of the popular YA book series follows last year's Divergent as heroine Tris Prior (Shailene Woodley) continues to fight the good fight against tyranny in post-Apocalyptic Chicago.  It appears Tris may hold the key that could shatter the ideals of the utopian society forced on the masses by the city's leader (Kate Winslet).  Insurgent gets high marks for action and special effects.  The story itself can become a little muddied as there are so many factions with different agendas.  It's sometimes hard to keep straight what everyone is fighting for.  Overall, it's a solid effort.
***1/4 stars

Fast and Furious 7- In this 7th installment of the popular franchise, Dominic Toretto (Vin Diesel) and his crew of death-defying street racers are hunted by Deckard Shaw (Jason Statham), a rogue special forces assassin and brother to Owen who was put in traction by Dominic's crew in Fast 6.  The action movie genre is one my favorites and this series has never disappointed in that area, but, as with another action franchise, Transformers, you can get too much of a good thing.  Every action scene is cranked well beyond 10 and the testosterone flows by the bucket.  I usually feel I'm on sensory overload when I watch one of these films.  I suppose that's always been the franchise's charm, but, there are things that could be dialed back a bit even for me.  There is a very nice tribute to the departed Paul Walker at the end which adds a warm personal touch.  The regular cast of Michelle Rodriguez, Dwayne Johnson, Tyrese Gibson, Jordana Brewster, and Chris Bridges returns.
***1/4 stars

Cinderella- It appears Disney's new shtick is to turn their classic animated features to live action movies.  Following last year's Maleficent,  the House of Mouse gives the same treatment to Cinderella.  I won't bore you with plot details.  If you don't know this story by now, I can't help you. Like Maleficent, director, Kenneth Branagh and company, attempt to flesh out the story a little bit more and give you a backstory that gives a bit of new life to the classic tale you know.  It's entertaining.  Cate Blanchett makes a good evil stepmother, but, like last year's retelling, I'm not doing backflips over it.
***stars

Ex Machina- Another film involving the not so friendly interactions between man and machine and the possible consequences when machines become self aware.   A young programmer for a Google-type internet company is chosen to be the human tester of a new A.I. developed by the company's brilliant owner.  The new A.I. has been given a robotic body and female personality traits to interact with the programmer.  The two predictably become close.  But, does the machine really feel anything?  Was she programmed by the inventor to specifically interact with her tester?  Or, does she have an agenda all her own?  When the final curtain drops, it may not be good news for anyone involved.  This is a slow burning thriller that has some pretty frightening consequences when you look at the bigger picture. 
***1/2 stars

Seventh Son- This is a sword and sorcery adventure you've seen before.  Young man who feels lost all his life for some reason and can't figure out why realizes he's destined for something greater when he becomes the apprentice to a legendary warrior/wizard/sage.  Like I said, plot wise and character wise, nothing you haven't seen before.  But, that doesn't mean it isn't entertaining.  The star in this movie is the special effects designer.  Between the dragons, monsters, and witches you have a fun little mishmash of creature concepts.  It's solid if not spectacular entertainment.  One question I will ask is can we officially say Jeff Bridges has now been typecast?  He's played a drunken, gruff variation of the Rooster Cogburn character a few times now.  Julianne Moore co-stars.
*** stars

The Loft- Five successful, married professional men get more than they bargained for when a dead woman is found in the swinging secret sex condo they share.  How did she get there?  Did any of five men know her?  Are they being set up by vengeful wives?  Is this an elaborate set up by someone within the group for the purpose of revenge?  All are questions posed in this taut, twisty thriller.  The resolution does leave a little to be desired, but, you'll enjoy the ride getting there.
Karl Urban, Eric Stonestreet, Wentworth Miller, and James Marsden star.
***1/4 stars

Roommate Wanted- Alexa Vega and Spencer Grammer star as roommates (who aren't the best of friends, much less the best of roommates) that begin competing for the same lucrative opportunity. 
It leads to a darkly comic night of total war between the two where the insecurities of both combatants are laid bare.  I was amazed at how much I enjoyed this movie even through its absurd ending.  It's not going to make the grade with most critics, but, I think this is a real sleeper.
***1/2 stars

Cut Bank- Liam Hemsworth is an auto mechanic and former high school football star who embarks on an elaborate plan to leave his small dead end Montana town.  However, all doesn't go as planned when his co-conspirators begin to fall at the hands of mysterious assassin.  The description I read of this film described it as Fargo-like.  To me that translates as a quirky and darkly funny crime thriller.  That's not what Cut Bank is with its meandering and, at times, confusing plot.  Considering the cast, this one was disappointing.  John Malkovich, Bruce Dern, Oliver Platt, Theresa Palmer, and Billy Bob Thornton co-star.
**1/2 stars

Focus- Will Smith is a con man extraordinaire who is knocked off his game by a beautiful novice con woman (Margot Robbie) who he falls hard for.  But in this game of lies, does she really reciprocate his feelings or is she playing him?  And even though he's crazy about her, is he above using her as a pawn in one of his schemes?  Although Smith and Robbie give convincing performances, the storyline itself has no real depth.  The characters move from con to con, have sex, and then move from con to con again.  It's somewhat entertaining at times, but, the film won't leave you with any real sense it accomplished anything other than seeing two criminals (albeit likable ones) hook up.
*** stars

Jupiter Ascending- A lot is made of director, M. Night Shyamalan, losing his way as a director/screenwriter.  You can add the Wachowskis to this list as well.  Have they produced anything worth watching since the first Matrix?  Maybe I'll give you V for Vendetta, but not much more.  It seems humans originated on other planets and "seeded" Earth among other worlds to provide genetic raw material to make the human elite essentially immortal.  Enter Jupiter Jones (Mila Kunis), an unremarkable young woman who lives in Chicago and cleans houses for a living with her mother and aunt.  Apparently Jupiter is genetically identical to the deceased matriarch of the powerful House Abrasax and somehow "owns" the Earth as a result.  This makes her a valuable pawn to be manipulated among House Abrasax's squabbling siblings.  Enter Caine Wise (Channing Tatum), a genetically engineered soldier sent by one of the siblings to protect Jupiter.  Does this sibling have an evil agenda of his own?  Of course he does. Will Chase turn on his master and fall in love with Jupiter?  Of course he will.  Does any of this convoluted mess make much sense?  Of course it doesn't.  At times this movie looked like a B-level sci-fi film.  Neither the story nor the characters are terribly compelling.  Most of it was a bore to sit through.  Eddie Redmayne and Sean Bean co-star.
**stars

Insidious:  Chapter 3- The third chapter of the horror franchise is a prequel chronicling events that happen just a few months prior to those in the first film.  A teenage girl has been targeted by a supernatural entity residing in the apartment building where she lives.  Enter, psychic extraordinaire, Elise Rainier who is recruited by the girl's father to bring her back from the nether dimension known as The Further.  As with all the movies in this franchise, chapter 3 is high on the creep factor.  The storyline is a little dull for my tastes, particularly, the games the audience is taken through with Elise's fence riding of will she/won't she help.  We've now been witness to The Further for three films now with no new insights into this realm from chapters 2 and 3.  While the scares are still good, nothing seems to have really progressed in the narrative.  Scares will eventually only take you so far.
**3/4 stars

The Duff- Mae Whitman stars as a teenager who comes to the realization that she's the Designated Ugly Fat Friend amongst her pals.  She enlists the aid of the callous high school football captain to make her over into something more desirable.  Sound familiar?  It should.  You've seen this story before in a million "ugly duckling"-type films.  The Duff has all the usual clichés of teen romantic comedies including the realization of the jock that Miss Plain Jane is actually hot.  I was fully prepared to have a "meh" reaction to the film.  But, I surprisingly liked The Duff quite a bit.  It has some biting, snarky humor and is quite funny.  It's funnier than most movies in this genre.  Much credit should go to Whitman for her performance as well.  She is believable as the "invisible" girl.  Not that she isn't cute, but, she carries herself in a way where she wouldn't necessarily stand out in a crowd.  This movie just feels more believable than a similar movie, She's All That.  Ken Jeong, Romany Malco, and Robbie Amel co-star.
***1/4 stars

Project Almanac- A brilliant 17-year old high school student discovers the blueprints for a temporal displacement (time) machine his late father developed.  Along with his sister, two best friends, and his longtime crush, he is able to build a working model of the machine.  The group travels back in time for their own individual gains.  But, as you know with time travel, changing events in the past can have dire consequences.  The timeline really goes haywire when the teen travels back alone to change a missed opportunity.  Project Almanac is shot in the found footage format, and, like most movies shot in this style, was very annoying for me.  Time travel stories are not easy to write because they can become very convoluted.  This film is no different as the story starts to cave in on itself a little near the end.  There's still enough good elements along the way to give it a mild recommendation.
*** stars

Ted 2- The crude bong-smoking teddy bear-come-to-life (voiced by Seth MacFarlane) is back for a second round of comic hijinks with his mostly clueless best buddy, John (Mark Wahlberg).  To save his marriage to his human wife, Tami-Lynn, Ted wants to have a child.  The only problem is he lacks the anatomy  and genetic material to do it.  Furthermore, the couple can't adopt because, well, Ted is a toy and not recognized as a person.  So, it's up to Ted and John, along with attorney, Sam L. Jackson (Amanda Seyfried), to prove that Ted is indeed a person in the eyes of the law.  Yes, it's as ridiculous as it sounds.  Some of the racially-charged humor MacFarlane throws at the audience I swear I didn't want to laugh at.  But, I couldn't help myself.  There is some truly inspired comedy here, but, unlike the first film, Ted 2 begins to lag a little bit after about an hour.  It doesn't suffer from the sequel jinx of most comedy follow ups, but it is clearly not the same caliber as the original.  It's still fairly solid.  Cameos by Liam Neeson and NFL quarterback, Tom Brady, are fall-off-your-seat funny.  Stay until the end of the credits for a follow up on Neeson's small part.  Giovanni Ribisi and Morgan Freeman co-star.
***1/4 stars

Terminator:  Genisys- Director, Alan Taylor, retcons the entire Terminator saga in this latest installment that resets the franchise.  Skynet, the evil computer program that destroys the world in 1997, sends yet another killer cyborg into the past, this time to 1973.  The object?  Kill Sarah Connor as a nine year old.  But as with every other time, someone sends a protector into the past.   Again, it's a reprogrammed T-800 series cyborg who Sarah affectionately begins to know as "Pops."  In the future of 2029, Sarah's son, John, the leader of the human resistance, again sends his father (who doesn't know John is his son), Kyle Reese, to 1984 (?) to protect Sarah following the original Terminator timeline. But an event happens in this instance that fractures the timeline.  Now Sarah, Kyle, and "Pops" must prevent Judgment Day from happening in 2017 as Skynet is now attempting to backdoor its way in to the destruction of humanity through a benign global networking program called Genisys.  Confused yet?  If not, you probably should be.  Genisys will probably leave you with more questions than answers, the first of which is "Who sent Pops to protect 9-year old Sarah?"  As with all time travel stories, there are some things that make absolutely no sense at this point.  But, since this is the first part of what is hoped to be a new trilogy, I assume more answers will be forthcoming.  If you watch the film as simply a work of science fiction and not try to figure out where it fits in the other Terminators, it's actually quite enjoyable and won't make your head hurt.  I went in not knowing what to expect and came out curious as to where this story will be taken in the next installments.  Arnold Schwarzenegger, Emilia Clarke, and Jai Courtney star.
*** stars

Jurassic World- Man attempts to defy nature again in this fourth installment of the popular franchise.  More than two decades after the first disastrous foray into dino-gene splicing, a new theme park has opened in Central America complete with aerial, land, and sea test tube dinosaurs.  The corporation controlling the park has a secret, separate agenda unknown to even its CEO.  Develop fearsome creatures that can be used for military operations.  One brand new creation made by the company's scientists is the fearsome Indominus Rex, a dinosaur larger, more intelligent, and more vicious than the T-Rex.   So, of course, it's the only I-Rex on the island that escapes its cage and wreaks havoc while more than 20,000 patrons are there for a good time.  Once again, it's up to some of the courageous staff to end the dino-carnage before all the humans there become a hot lunch.  So, no one has exactly invented the wheel here.  Once the Indominus goes wild, it's pretty much Jurassic Park.  There's a parallel story here involving two boys who are sent to the park by their divorcing parents to spend time with their straight-laced by-the-book aunt (Bryce Dallas Harper) who is also the park's operations manager.  There's good chemistry between Howard and the park's Velociraptor wrangler, Owen (Chris Pratt).  The photography and special effects are top notch.  But, like I said, they're not exactly inventing the wheel here.
*** stars

Minions- Those gibberish speaking, yellow knuckleheads from the Despicable Me series are back.  This is a prequel to  the DM series that follows the Minions evolution from single-celled organisms to the servants of the most heinous villains they can find.  After their bumbling accidentally kills every master they've had from a T-Rex to Napoleon, they fall into exile until three courageous Minions set out on a request to find another evil master.  So, there is a loose story (to put it mildly) regarding the Minions being manipulated into stealing the crown of England, but a story in a movie like this is pretty much secondary.  Let's be honest.  You're watching a film like this to see the Minions act crazy and it delivers plenty of those scenes.  Your satisfaction with the movie will depend on your level of affection for these little guys.  That's the bottom line.  Sandra Bullock, Jon Hamm, Michael Keaton, Allison Janney, and, yes, Steve Carrell (as young Gru) lend their voice talents.
***1/2 stars

Trainwreck- Comedienne, Amy Schumer, wrote and stars in this tale of a commitment-phobic young journalist who is assigned to write a story about a successful, up-and-coming sports doctor (Bill Hader).  Schumer's character is a total mess, a trainwreck if you will.  She drinks too much, smokes too much pot, and beds strange men at an alarming rate.  Then, the unthinkable happens.  She finds herself drawn to and falling for the straight-laced doctor and she can't have that!  Schumer is a comic force, no doubt, but she also shows surprising dramatic depth when the script calls for it.  It's a noteworthy performance.  As good as Schumer is though, many of the standout comic punches come from the real life athletes co-starring in the film.  John Cena, Ama're Stoudemire, and LeBron James all shine in their respective moments.  This is the best movie from director, Judd Apatow, in a good long time.  Brie Larson and Tilda Swinton (hilarious as Schumer's editor) co-star.
**** stars

Maggie- In a much different role than we are used to seeing from him, Arnold Schwarzenegger stars as the father of a teenage girl (Abigail Breslin) who is infected by a zombie-virus in a post apocalyptic world where many are infected, but society still functions normally to a degree.  As I said, it's a very different type of role for Schwarzenegger.  No out of this world action sequences, no one-liners.  Just a father who knows deep down what he will need to do in the end and the pain that comes from knowing the inevitable.  It's a very good job from Breslin as well struggling through her transformation.  Maggie is a bit slow moving, but I appreciated the different take on a subject that might be starting to be overused.
***1/4 stars

Beyond the Reach- A corporate tycoon plays a dangerous game of survival with his young guide in the desert in this little-known thriller.  The tycoon (Michael Douglas) is a remorseless egomaniac who takes pleasure in torturing his young captive (Jeremy Irvine) which is fun in and of itself seeing Douglas gleefully evil. This would have been a decent enough little thriller if not for the ending.  It makes no sense for Douglas' character to take the action he does.  This is supposed to be a pretty smart guy who does one the absolute dumbest things in movie history considering that he likely would have gotten away with what he did.  It's baffling. 
**3/4 stars

Pixels- Video games Pac-Man, Centipede, and Donkey Kong among others come to life in this alien invasion comedy.  A U.S. probe is sent into space in the eighties with footage of video game graphics.  The aliens who intercept the probe see the footage as a declaration of war by Earth.  They send their forces to deal with the "threat" using video game graphics as the harbingers of the planet's destruction.  The U.S. President (Kevin James) calls on the expertise of old video gaming friends (Adam Sandler and Josh Gad) along with an old video game rival (Peter Dinklage) to defeat the invaders.  Pixels is creative, and, while not always laugh out loud funny, it does put a smile on your face the vast majority of the time.  Sandler again tones down on the obnoxious and plays another poor schlub of a character that he has been doing a lot of in recent memory.  And, if you grew up in the '80s, how can you not at least be intrigued by classic video games coming to life?
***1/4 stars

Vacation- Remakes are rarely good ideas because the original version of the concept is usually considered a classic and the idea of a redo on a classic is met with immediate rancor. In many cases, this is the correct reaction.  But, you do have those rare occasions where the remake, while not necessarily better than the original, is a credit to it.  And, surprisingly, this is the case with this remake of the '80's road comedy.  The story still follows the Griswold family, only this time, it is son, Rusty's (Ed Helms), family that takes a disastrous trip to Wally World.  Vulgar and crass, Vacation will also have you in stitches throughout.  You probably won't look at Chris Hemsworth the same way again.  Christina Applegate and Leslie Mann co-star.  Cameo appearances by Chevy Chase, Beverly D'Angelo, and Norman Reedus as well.
***1/4 stars

The Gift- Joel Edgerton co-stars and makes his directorial debut in this twisty psychological thriller about an odd man who "reunites" with an old high school acquaintance.  Simon (Jason Bateman) and his wife Robyn (Rebecca Hall) have moved back to Simon's old stomping grounds in California to start over after a miscarriage.  They seem to have an idyllic life until "Gordo" (Edgerton) consistently inserts himself into it with unexpected visits to their new home and unwanted gifts (at least by Simon).  Robyn believes Gordo is misunderstood.  Simon isn't so sure.  Especially since he knows more about their mysterious new "friend" than he lets on.  What does Gordo want?  What is Simon hiding?  The Gift is a bloodless thriller that gets into your head in a big way.  The lines between protagonist/antagonist are blurred as neither Gordo nor Simon are completely what they seem.  The open ended finale still leaves some questions to be answered which I usually don't go for.  However, it worked for me here.
***1/2 stars

What We Do in the Shadows- This different and funny mockumentary follows four vampire roommates ranging  from a "youthful" 183-year old to a crusty, Nosferatu-like 8,000-year old struggling to get along in a modern world.  Their issues ranging from dividing the household chores to antagonizing the local werewolves are hilariously recorded by a documentary crew.  This is seriously the most fun you may ever have watching vampires.
***1/2 stars

Burying the Ex- Good guy, Max (Anton Yelchin), has a beautiful girlfriend (Ashley Greene) who loves him with all her heart.  Too bad she's a jealous, controlling, tyrannical environmentalist, too.  When an unfortunate accident befalls her, her love (or obsession) brings her back to be with her man.  But, she just happens to be a zombie now and her boyfriend is desperately trying to move on with the owner of a specialty ice cream shop (Alexandra Daddario).   The film is a cute little macabre tale that surprisingly has a few very dark moments.  It's not the best horror comedy that has ever been made, but, it goes down easy enough as a fun little romp.
*** stars

Barely Lethal- Hailee Steinfeld stars as a teenager who has been trained since she was orphaned at childhood to be an assassin by a secret government organization.  Believing she has missed out on the joys of childhood, she fakes her death to sneak away to lead a normal teenage life. But navigating the obstacles of high school prove to be a bigger challenge than any of her field assignments ever were.  This film attempts to be a whimsical teen comedy, but, I think that was a mistake.  This girl is an assassin.  There's nothing whimsical about her former life and the whole venture is a bit silly if mildly funny at times.  I think dark comedy would have been the way to go here if they wanted to introduce that element.  Opportunity missed.  Samuel L. Jackson, Jessica Alba, and Sophie Turner co-star.
**3/4 stars

Straight Outta Compton- This film chronicles the rise and fall of rap super group, N.W.A.  It's one of the better biopics I've seen in recent memory.  The story moves along at steady, continuous pace throughout its 2.5 hour run time.  The actors, particularly O'Shea Jackson Jr. (Ice Cube's real life son), give spot on performances.  As with many artists in the music industry, this talented group's meteoric rise gets derailed by a variety of factors.  Director, F. Gary Gray, depicts the group as the voice of a generation for inner city youth.  Whether you believe that or not or even agree with the controversies they were front and center on, you can't deny the power they possessed in their powerful rhymes.  Paul Giamatti co-stars.
***3/4 stars

The Gunman- Sean Penn stars as an ex-soldier whose past catches up to him from an assassination he carried out eight years prior.  Penn got in tremendous shape for this role, but, it's an obvious attempt to grab part of the demand for over 50 action stars that Liam Neeson has so masterfully cornered.  It's a fairly standard action thriller.  It's not the going to make you stand up and cheer.  It won't make you kick your television.  Javier Bardem and Idris Elba co-star.
**3/4 stars

Child 44- Tom Hardy stars as a dutiful officer of the Soviet Secret Police in the Stalin-era Soviet Union.  He begins to uncover a mystery involving murdered children when the son of his partner is killed.  In addition to finding the serial killer, he must also contend with a jealous fellow officer who covets his position and wife.  The plot has all the makings of a tight thriller.  If only the execution matched the plotting.  The film slogs along for more than two hours and had me fading in and out through boredom.  The performances aren't bad, it just takes an irritatingly long time for anything to happen that's worthwhile.  Joel Kinnaman, Noomi Rapace, and Gary Oldman co-star.
**3/4 stars

Slow West- In this western, a bounty hunter (Michael Fassbender) accompanies a newly-arrived-to the U.S., young Scottish man in a quest to find the woman the young man loves.  The young woman has a price on her head that has attracted several unsavory collectors.  Part comedy, part actioner, Slow West never quite grabbed me.  It engages just enough to prevent terminal boredom, but, it never provides more than a middling interest level.
**3/4 stars

The Visit- The much maligned M. Night Shymalan's latest feature is another adventure into the strange and unusual. It is a solid, fun thriller-with-a twist reminiscent of the director's earlier efforts.  A mother, long estranged from her parents, is unexpectedly contacted by them.  To mend the rift between the parties, she sends her two teenage children for a short visit with the grandparents they never knew.  However, after they arrive, the teenagers soon realize all is not right with "Nanna and Pop Pop."  True horror mavens may be a little disappointed as The Visit isn't necessarily scary.  It has a few sudden surprises.  But, it is weird.  It has a fair amount of humor injected into it, as well.  Overall, the Shymalan haters don't have a reason to gag with this one.
***1/4 stars

The Perfect Guy- Similar to last year's "No Good Deed", The Perfect Guy is the equivalent of the greasiest cheeseburger that you know is not good for you, but, it goes down so smoothly.  The film is cliché-riddled.  You'll be able to predict the ending 10 minutes in.  But, it's an enjoyable enough journey getting there. After a painful breakup, a successful lobbyist falls for an immensely charming stranger.  She has seemingly met, "the perfect guy."  But, has she?  How well does she really know this new man who has swept her off her feet?  Will she like the answers?   The film won't win any awards for creativity, but, there are worse ways to spend a lazy afternoon.  Sanaa Lathan, Michael Ealy, and Morris Chestnut star.
***1/4 stars

Paul Blart:  Mall Cop 2-  You see what happens America?  You support a cute little harmless comedy in 2009 to the tune of almost $200 million and you get Paul Blart 2!  Why, America?  Why? This time around, our schlubby hero attempts to foil an art heist in a Las Vegas hotel.  I like Kevin James, but this was clearly an attempt at a quick money grab by Adam Sandler's Happy Madison production company.  It has a bad script and is just generally unfunny.  It only gets the rating I'm giving it because I like Kevin James.
** stars

Aloha- Director, Cameron Crowe, brings us the tale of a Defense liaison (Bradley Cooper) who returns to his former stomping grounds in Hawaii (some stomping grounds) to facilitate a satellite launch for his billionaire employer (Bill Murray).  Since it's a joint venture with the U.S. Air Force, he's teamed with a personal Air Force "watchdog" (Emma Stone).  Cooper's cynical character has a sordid past and he eventually finds love and redemption teaming with his wide-eyed, idealistic partner.  I'm not sure what Crowe was aiming for with all of the Hawaiian folklore references here.  They were a bit tedious.  The film is mildly humorous throughout.  It's ultimately a big pile of nothing in the end, but, it's not an awful big pile of nothing.  In other words, it's a rental and nothing more.  Rachel McAdams, Alec Baldwin, Danny McBride, and John Krasinski co-star.
**3/4 stars

The Green Inferno- Director Eli Roth's latest splatterfest follows a group of activist college  students attempting to stop a large corporation  from destroying part of the Amazonian rainforest and uprooting its indigenous inhabitants.  After experiencing some initial success, the group's plane crash lands in the middle of said forest on the way home.  And, the natives ain't friendly!  Roth's usual gore is present, but, for me it wasn't quite as graphic or gruesome as his Hostel outings.  A fair amount of humor and absurdity is also inserted for good measure.  If your taste in horror is gore galore, you'll be entertained.  The film gives new meaning to the phrase, "No good deed goes unpunished."
***1/4 stars

Felt- This psychological thriller shot documentary style follows a disturbed young female artist suffering from the past trauma of sexual abuse.  Her art takes the form of bizarre misogynistic costumes she loses herself in on a regular basis, possibly to murderous degrees.  You know, 2015 has been a good year for movies in the sense that I haven't seen anything truly dreadful three quarters of the way through.  Well, nothing lasts forever does it?  If you ever fantasized about people wearing flesh-colored suits fitted with fake penises and very large vaginas, Felt is right here for you.  But, between the fake sex organs, is dreadful dialog that is supposed to pass as insightful often, humorous at times.  It fails at both.
* star

Lila and Eve- Viola Davis and Jennifer Lopez star as mothers who meet at a support group for parents who have lost their children to violent crimes.  They bond and decide to turn vigilante hunting down those responsible for the murder of Davis' teenage son. It's a fairly standard revenge-driven film that is slightly bolstered by a twist you may see coming if you are the observant type.  It's not a completely engrossing movie, but, it's just entertaining enough to recommend on a small level.
*** stars

Knock Knock- Eli Roth directs this thriller of a family man who pays dearly for a moment of weakness when two beautiful strangers come calling on a rainy night.  Roth is known for torture horror.  While there is that element in this film, it's more softcore Roth than the stomach-churning, bodysplitting madness of his usual fare.  It's trashy cinema at its core.  It won't be for everyone.  There are no takeaways here (except maybe for unfaithful spouses).  It doesn't always make a lot of sense.  But, it's silliness has some entertainment value.  Keanu Reeves stars.
**3/4 stars

Crimson Peak- Guillermo Del Toro's goth horror-romance is big on creep factor at times, but not particularly what a true horror maven would deem to be horror.  The good-the ghostly imagery is spot on.  The story?  Fairly standard.  At the turn of the 20th century, a strong-willed young American heiress falls for a British aristocrat to her father's dismay.  After marrying and moving back to his rundown manor in England, some sinister secrets of past events in the manor are revealed and the heiress is embroiled in a fight for survival.  Mia Wasikowska , Tom Hiddleston, Jessica Chastain, and Charlie Hunnam star.
***1/4 stars

Final Girl- Abigail Breslin stars as trained assassin tasked with infiltrating and taking down a group of privileged young men who get their jollies by coaxing young women into the forest, and then hunting them for sport.  There is virtually no explanation for why any of this is happening.  We see part of Breslin's training from her handler (Wes Bentley), but, we're not sure why she is chosen for this training in the first place.  Normally, this would be a messy film that I would never recommend.  But, I did find entertainment value in watching these young psychopaths go down.  So there's that.
*** stars

Good Kill- Ethan Hawke stars as a combat-tested Air Force pilot who is now saddled with fighting the Taliban through a radio-controlled drone from a trailer in Las Vegas.  Ahh, 21st century warfare at its finest.  Good Kill is a slow burn of a movie, but, it does bring up a plethora of moral quandaries.  How much collateral damage is "acceptable?"  Are we justified destroying innocents if we are also protecting American lives?  It's a heavy burden.  Is there a clear right or wrong answer?
***1/4 stars

The Peanuts Movie- Charles Schulz's little animated munchkins return for the first time since forever.  It's a rather unambitious movie, but, cute.  It's the Peanuts.  Charlie Brown's still insecure, Lucy's still a fussbudget, Woodstock still can't fly straight, and Snoopy steals the show as always.  Everything you've come to expect from this group. 
***1/4 stars

The Hunger Games:  Mockingjay part 2- After four feature films, this YA series comes to an end with a competent, if not completely spectacular finale.  Jennifer Lawrence is her usual exceptional self as main protagonist, Katniss Everdeen.  The final battle for Pan Em is intense and introduces some fairly hideous monstrosities called "Mutts" that I don't recall seeing in the previous installments. But, there are also a few weird transitions in the film.  Transitions where the lights go out for a character and we find out a ton has happened in the interim.  Like I said, a competent, but not spectacular ending.
***1/2 stars

Secret In Their Eyes- This crime thriller is a film that chugs along at a moderate predictable pace...until it doesn't.  I have to admit this movie made a sharp turn that I wasn't expecting at all.  And, unlike many cookie-cutter thrillers, it makes some hard uncomfortable choices for its characters and doesn't take the easy way out.  Are the good guys still the good guys?  Sort of.  If you're a fan of "justice" you will find great satisfaction in the resolution. Chiwetel Ejiofor, Julia Roberts, and Nicole Kidman star.
***3/4 stars

The Final Girls- If nothing else, you have to say this horror comedy takes a unique approach.  A teenager, whose mother was an 80's "Scream Queen", is unfathomably sucked into one of her mother's horror movies along with four of her friends.  The film attempts to satirize many of the common tropes of the genre like many before it to varying degrees of success.  It's cute and mildly funny.  It does add a surprising layer of emotion fairly successfully at times as well.  Taissa Farmiga, Malin Akerman, and Nina Dobrev star.
*** stars

Victor Frankenstein- James McAvoy and Daniel Radcliffe take a stab at the Mary Shelley legend as the titular Frankenstein and Igor (sort of), respectively.  It's definitely stylish with McAvoy chewing the scenery as the almost maniacally obsessed scientist intent on defeating death itself.  Radcliffe acts (tries to at least) as the moral compass of the film advising the good Dr. Frankenstein against his present courses of action to no avail.  The movie comes up with a creative way to turn Igor from hunchback to heartthrob which is something no other Frankenstein movie has done to my knowledge. Victor Frankenstein is filled with fun thrills leading up to the creation of the iconic monster.  But, if you are expecting a classic monster mash, you may be a little disappointed as there isn't much Dr. Frankenstein's creation in the film.  But, this is more about the relationship between Frankenstein and Igor.  Maybe we'll get more monster if there's a sequel.
***1/4 stars

The Gallows- This is the type of horror movie that makes me angry.  First, it's a found footage film which I would like to outlaw.  Second, there's a nonsensical buildup that goes nowhere (did the folks behind Paranormal Activity have something to do with this).  Last, and this is the cardinal sin of horror, it's not remotely scary.  It barely registers as weird and only tips the needle to that level at the very end.  I guess it's no secret I didn't like this one at all.  Twenty years after a tragic accident occurs at a high school play, the school attempts to restage it and honor the unfortunate soul who perished.  What could go wrong?  This one is a dog.

*1/2 stars

Pitch Perfect 2- The Bellas have returned!  Those crazy a Cappella girls sing and dance their way to the world championships in this sequel that may not resonate the same way as the surprise original (surprise because I really liked a musical), but still produces enough laughs to recommend.  The real treat here, as with the original, are the musical mashups.  After an unfortunate performance mishap  with the President in attendance, the Bellas are suspended from their tour and from competing in their college singing competition.  But, a loophole will allow them to get back on the circuit if they can just do one thing no American a Cappella group has done before.  Win the world championship in Copenhagen.  Pitch Perfect 2 isn't perfect, but it is fun.  Anna Kendrick, Rebel Wilson, Brittany Snow, and Hailee Steinfield star.

***1/4 stars

San Andreas- Dwayne Johnson stars as an LAFD Rescue officer trying to save both his estranged wife and daughter from a disastrous earthquake in California.  This is a standard cookie-cutter disaster movie.  Johnson's charisma carries it to a degree, but, aside from some spectacular shots of buildings crumbling and objects crashing into each other, there isn't a lot to sink your teeth into.  I'll give it a slight recommendation for being a spectacle.  Carla Gugino, Alexandra Daddario, and Paul Giamatti co-star.

*** stars

Paddington- This live action family comedy follows the adventures of Paddington Bear, the walking, talking bruin from darkest Peru with an unhealthy love of marmalade.  Found by the Brown family at Paddington Station in London, he's taken in by the family and causes all sorts of unintentional mischief.  Paddington was a far better movie than I imagined it would be.  I'm not the biggest fan of family comedies as they tend to be on the hokey side of the spectrum, but, there are genuine laughs here.  Nicole Kidman chews the scenery as an evil museum taxidermist who wants to make Paddington part of her collection.
***1/2 stars

Home- This animated film features the voice of Jim Parsons as Oh, a well-meaning, but, calamity-stricken member of the Boov.  The Boov are a conforming, peace loving race of aliens who bloodlessly invade Earth to escape enemies of their species.  Unfortunately, Oh, has unintentionally set events in motion that will bring the Boov's enemies to Earth.  Home is not a bad animated feature, but, there are so many that are better and funnier.  It provides a few chuckles, but, nothing more.  Steve Martin, Rhianna, and Jennifer Lopez also lend their voices to the film.
**3/4 stars

Spotlight- Based on real life events, Spotlight follows the story of a group of Boston Globe journalists and their attempts to expose child molestation and cover up by the Boston Archdiocese.  While it is a somewhat fascinating and disturbing tale of depravity, it's a long slow-moving film that has so many different characters involved in the cover-up that it's hard to follow at times.  But, there's no doubt it's well-acted.  That's what makes it worth at least one watch.  Michael Keaton, Mark Ruffalo, Rachel McAdams, Liev Schreiber, and Stanley Tucci star.
***1/4 stars

I Spit on Your Grave 3:  Vengeance is Mine- After focusing on a different character and storyline in the second chapter of the revenge-driven franchise, the series comes back to the original victim-turned-vigilante from the first film, Jennifer Hills (Sarah Butler).  Having changed her name, she's living a new life in a new city. Even with regular visits to her therapist and rape survivor group, she's finding it a little difficult to readjust to normal life.  When tragedy befalls a woman she has befriended in her group, those old memories come flooding back, as well as, her blood thirst for vengeance.  Once again, I give the filmmakers credit for coming up with some graphic kills, but, where you sympathized with Jennifer in the first film even as brutal as her vengeance was, it's hard to do so here.  Her nastiness isn't only reserved for scumbags.  She's just plain mean spirited in general.  I'm far from an authority on the behavior of rape victims, so far be it from me to say her reaction to the rest of world is exaggerated or not, but, I honestly wanted someone to put her out of her misery this time around. 
**3/4 stars

Dope- High school senior, Malcolm, is an awkward geek who hangs out exclusively with his two best friends.  Living in the rough and tumble "Bottoms" in Inglewood, CA, Malcolm aspires to be accepted to Harvard.  He's obsessed with 90's hip hop culture, and, he's continually bullied.  When he is befriended by a local drug dealer, his life changes for the weird as he discovers sides to his personality he has never explored before.  Dope has several amusing moments, a couple of laugh out loud ones.  It meanders a little about halfway through, but, the audience is taken on a wild journey as Malcolm has to use his smarts to navigate some tricky, and, sometimes dangerous situations.  You'll have a good time.
***1/4 stars

Sisters- Tina Fey and Amy Poehler star as siblings, one responsible to a fault and the other immature as all get out, who have one final house party in their old childhood home.  Naturally, things get way out of hand.  So, this is a vehicle for the two leading ladies' craziness.  And, make no mistake they are funny.  They also get some great comedic support from some of their co-stars, particularly James Brolin and Dianne Wiest, who play the leads' parents.  WWE star, John Cena, also adds his comedic talents as a drug dealer.  Aside from some sibling angst, there's nothing very deep about Sisters plot wise.  But, like I said, it's funny.  Fulfills the first rule of comedy.  Maya Rudolph and John Leguizamo also co-star.
***1/2 stars

The Ridiculous 6- Listen, I know Adam Sandler doesn't make the greatest movies in the world.  But if you listen to some, he can't do anything right.  Hasn't done anything right since maybe The Wedding Singer.  For whatever reason, he rubs people the wrong way now.  In his latest venture, The Ridiculous 6, a collaboration between Sandler's Happy Madison production company and Netflix, he is one of six very different brothers in the Old West fathered by the same outlaw (Nick Nolte).  It's the typical obnoxious hijinks you would expect from a Sandler film.  But, you know, sometimes they work.  That's the case here.  I chuckled throughout.  Maybe that doesn't say a lot about me or my mentality, but I was entertained.  That's the bottom line.  This movie is also getting flack for being racist and insensitive for its depiction of Native Americans.  If this group is insulted, I can't tell them how to feel, but, I found this to actually be less insulting to ethnic groups than Blazing Saddles.  And, THAT one is lauded as a comedy classic!  Terry Crews, Jorge Garcia, Rob Schneider, Taylor Lautner, Luke Wilson, Harvey Keitel, Nick Swardson, Jon Lovitz, David Spade, Vanilla Ice, and John Turturo in an absolutely hilarious 10 minutes of air time co-star. 
***1/4 stars

Tomorrowland- George Clooney stars as a genius inventor who is introduced to a fabulous future Earth filled with  scientific marvels dubbed Tomorrowland when he is a child.  Mysteriously kicked out of this world for "giving up", he ventures back to the land when a teenager (Britt Robertson) is dropped into his backyard by an old acquaintance.  Together they must prevent a coming apocalypse on Earth while avoiding the sinister agents from Tomorrowland trying to stop them.  There are some nice visuals and a few amusing moments, but, director, Brad Bird's, story is a little muddled and difficult to follow.  I was left not really knowing what the purpose of this movie was.  Is it "allow the dreamers to dream and build neat stuff?"  Is it "don't lose your faith?"  Is it "don't follow evil Hugh Laurie?"  It's somewhat entertaining, but, it made me scratch my head a little.
**3/4 stars

Joy- Loosely based on the life of Miracle Mop inventor, Joy Mangano, this dramedy from David O. Russell teams him once again with current actress of the millennium, Jennifer Lawrence.  Joy is a divorced mother who has had a talent for invention since childhood.  She comes up with the idea of her revolutionary mop after cutting herself on glass she was mopping up.  The rest is home shopping history.  This is a tale that isn't overly exciting, but it's made watchable by another exceptional performance by Lawrence.  One thing this film teaches, when money is involved, don't trust anyone including family.  Robert DeNiro, Diane Ladd, and Bradley Cooper co-star.
***1/4 stars

Mr. Holmes- Ian McKellen is the legendary detective living his final years quietly attempting to recount his final case with a failing memory.  He becomes close with his housekeeper's/caretaker's young son while the details of that last case are told in flashback.  It's a great performance by McKellen as he is pretty much the only thing that keeps the plodding story moving.  It's a sweet homage to a great fictional character, but, it's not terribly exciting.  Laura Linney co-stars.
**1/2 stars

Mission Impossible:  Rogue Nation- The fifth installment of the successful spy franchise finds IMF Agent, Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise), declared an enemy of the state.  That's rather inconvenient considering Hunt is on the trail of a new terrorist organization made up of former operatives from several spy/intelligence agencies around the world.  It's another solid effort in the MI franchise, this time brought to you by J.J. Abrams.  Say what you will about Cruise, he is a credible action star. 
***1/2 stars

Bone Tomahawk- Kurt Russell and Patrick Wilson star as members of a small Old West posse who embark on a dangerous rescue mission when cannibalistic, cave-dwelling savages kidnap some townspeople in their community.  So, basically, it's a mild attempt at horror with a western backdrop.  It's a slow moving film that does offer a bit of horrific imagery to break up the monotony on occasion.  But, this mashup tale of survival only mildly kept my attention.  I will give it this.  It does have one of goriest kills I've ever seen.
*** stars

Self/Less- A billionaire tycoon diagnosed with terminal cancer undergoes a radical new experiment where his consciousness can be transferred to an artificially grown body.  The experiment is successful until the tycoon's transferred consciousness begins having memories that aren't his own.  Self/Less is a bendy sci-fi thriller isn't always easy to follow.  The motivation for murder behind the main conflict also doesn't make a lot of sense given that if the subject tried to blow the whistle on the project, he would have a difficult time doing it considering he really has no way to prove who he is.  But, the film does provide a fascinating concept with a twist.  Ben Kingsley and Ryan Reynolds star.
***stars

Z for Zachariah- What the...?!!!  An adaptation of a post-apocalyptic science fiction novel, the story follows a bizarre love triangle that develops between a young woman (Margot Robbie), a chemist barely keeping a grip on sanity at times (Chiwetel Ejiofor), and a drifter (Chris Pine).  These three lost souls come together in a valley, a Garden of Eden if you will, that has been untouched by the ravages of nuclear war.  It's an understated, and by understated I mean coma-inducing, character study that leads viewers no where in particular.  There are many moments you think, "Ah, now we'll get down to it" only to have the film leave you hanging.  For a love triangle, everyone is just to dang polite!  Even the implied nastiness that happens near the end makes you feel absolutely nothing.  I'm shocked I didn't lose consciousness.
**1/4 stars

The Revenant- In this semi-biographical film, Leonardo DiCaprio stars as Hugh Glass, a historical hunter, trapper, and frontiersman.  When he's viciously mauled by a grizzly bear protecting her cubs, he's left broken and almost dead.  He's eventually left in the wilderness to perish by a member of his hunting party (Tom Hardy) who was tasked with overseeing his well-being.  In an incredible act of perseverance and survival, he lives to seek vengeance against the man who left him to die (and killed his son to boot).  Beautifully filmed with several panoramic scenes, the wilderness does come alive for the viewer.  I shivered myself a few times watching the winter landscapes.  Running at over 2 1/2 hours, it did go on a little too long for my liking.  Glass's fever dreams remembering his deceased wife and son became a little self-indulgent and only halted the movie's progress in my opinion.  But, great performances by DiCaprio and Hardy give this revenge-thriller more than enough juice to recommend.
***1/2 stars

The Martian- I never knew I could enjoy a movie about survival on another planet without the benefit of murderous alien monsters this much.  If you haven't seen the millions of trailers and previews for this film, a NASA astronaut (Matt Damon) is left on Mars by his team after he's lost in a vicious sandstorm and believed to be dead.  Stranded on a hostile planet with limited rations and a bleak hope of rescue, the astronaut must depend on every ounce of ingenuity he has if he expects to make it back home.  Director, Ridley Scott, gives us gritty tale of overcoming the worst odds imaginable with a slight dose of wit mixed in for good measure.  Jessica Chastain, Kate Mara, Kristen Wiig, Jeff Daniels, Michael Pena, and Chiwetel Ejiofor co-star.
***1/2 stars

Hotel Transylvania 2- Dracula (Adam Sandler) and the rest of the wacky animated monster crew from the first film are back.  This go around, Drac's daughter, Mavis (Selena Gomez) and her human husband (Andy Samberg), produce a grandchild who, to the Count's chagrin, may not be a monster.  Like the first feature, there are plenty of corny jokes and sight gags.  But, you know it all still works as well as it did the first time.  No, it's not breaking any new ground in animation, but, there's absolutely nothing wrong with just being fun.  And, that's what the Hotel Transylvania series is.  A lot of fun.  Steve Buscemi, Kevin James, Keegan Michael Key, and David Spade among many others lend their voice talents.
***1/4 stars

Deathgasm- This is one very unhinged horror comedy.  New kid in town, Brodie, befriends resident bad boy, Zakk.  The two bond through their love of heavy metal and form a band with two more of the social outcasts in their school.  By chance, some demonic sheet music comes into their possession and that's when the fun and games begin.  Deathgasm is a gross and gory splatterfest that doesn't attempt to take itself seriously.  That much is obvious when our "heroes" take on possessed townspeople armed only with sex toys.  The film has some huge laughs.  That alone makes it worth a look.
*** stars

Sicario- The war on drugs is front and center in this thriller.  An grizzled, but, idealistic FBI agent (Emily Blunt) is recruited for a covert mission to take down a Mexican drug cartel.  But, the means by which her new team operates doesn't sit well with her, particularly, those of a mysterious hitman on the team who has his own agenda.  It's a well-crafted story that moves at a steady pace with one very noteworthy performance by Benicio Del Toro.  Josh Brolin co-stars. 
***1/2 stars

Dark Places- Adapted from a best-selling novel by Gillian Flynn, Dark Places tells the story of woman (Charlize Theron) who is trying to piece together the night her mother and sisters were massacred decades earlier.  There are twists, turns, dips, and bends.  But, it's just excruciatingly slow getting to that point.  And, there are plot points that don't make a lot of sense when you think about them.  It's a story that had a lot of promise which, in the end, becomes a tedious bore.  Chloe Grace Moretz, Drea de Matteo, Nicholas Hoult, Corey Stoll, Tye Sheridan, and Christina Hendricks co-star.
**1/2 stars

American Ultra- A slacker stoner (Jesse Eisenberg) is in for a rude awakening when he discovers he is secretly a highly trained CIA super agent.  I found this to be a highly enjoyable action-comedy that deserved a better fate critically and financially at the box office.  And, it did something that I wasn't sure was possible.  It had me halfway like Kristen Stewart as for once she plays a character I didn't find completely useless.  Connie Britton, Walton Goggins, Topher Grace, John Leguizamo, and Bill Pullman co-star.
***1/4 stars


Cop Car- Two pre-teen boys get into more trouble than they bargained for when find what they believe is an abandoned police car and take it for a joy ride.  Unfortunately, the car isn't abandoned and the local sheriff wants it back desperately.  Cop Car has a promising framework for a story that doesn't quite come together for me.  For one thing, the boys, while very young, are also very stupid.  Pointing loaded guns at your friends even in jest is never a good idea.  It's a very simple plot that doesn't provide you with answers to every mystery it presents.  I didn't see a lot of point to it all. Kevin Bacon stars.
**3/4 stars

Heist- The story of a desperate father who becomes part of a crew to knock off his boss's casino.  Things don't go quite as planned as the crew has to make their getaway by hijacking a commuter bus.  Meanwhile both police and the casino boss's sinister agents are in hot pursuit.  It's a well-acted, but, standard heist/chase movie.  For high speed bus adventures, you're better off watching Speed, but, this one is adequate enough, and I say this not being the biggest fan of heist movies.  Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Morris Chestnut, Dave Batista, Gina Carano, and Robert DeNiro star.
*** stars

The Intern- This comedy from director, Nancy Meyers, follows a widowed retiree (Robert DeNiro) who is hired as an intern at a successful up-and-coming e-Commerce company run by a sweet, but, driven owner/CEO (Anne Hathaway).  The intern becomes a type of father figure for everyone in the office including the CEO.  Frivolity and mildly wacky adventures ensue.  It's a cute, sweet movie that goes down easy enough.  It's not particularly memorable, but, it gives a few decent chuckles to pass the time.
*** stars

Inside Out- We now come to Disney/Pixar's latest Oscar contender for Best Animated Film (don't they have one every year).  Here the studio literally dives into the mind of a young girl from infancy as her emotions (Joy, Sadness, Anger, Disgust, and Fear) are given life.  It's a clever and often funny foray into what makes people tick.  As amusing as it can be, it does turn down some dark paths into the girl's psyche which can get a bit depressing.  So, if you're looking for a fun-loving adventure, be prepared to take a good amount of salt with the sweet.  Amy Poehler, Bill Hader, Lewis Black, Mindy Kaeling, and Diane Lane lend their voice talents.
***1/2 stars

The Night Before- Three lifelong friends (Seth Rogen, Anthony Mackie, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt) who have shared nights of debauchery and hilarity with each other for years every Christmas Eve have one final memorable fling before the trappings of adulthood render this annual ritual null and void.  A night of mindbending drugs, soul searching, and the hunt for the ultimate Christmas party follows.  If you've seen the trailer for this one, it's far funnier than the movie itself.  People getting high as a kite is just not huge source of comedy for me.  I chuckled a few times, but, I found this wacky Christmas Eve lacking in a lot of wacky.
**3/4 stars

Maze Runner:  The Scorch Trials- The second chapter in the movie adaptation of the YA book series find our surviving teen heroes (The Gladers) search for clues as to what the corrupt scientific body known as WCKD have been testing them for in this post-apocalyptic world.  Escaping WCKD into the wasteland known as the Scorch, they join with resistance fighters against the still vastly overpowering military force WCKD can bring to bear.  Adapting YA novels to film is one of Hollywood's latest crazes.  In my opinion, none** have been as successfully done as The Hunger Games and even that series was a little uneven at times.  The first Maze Runner film had more urgency and mystery than the second chapter.  This one left me feeling "was this trip really necessary?"  It's a really blah second act for me.  The surviving cast from the first Maze Runner returns for this one.
**3/4 stars

Room- A critical darling that earned actress, Brie Larson, her first Oscar, Room is the tale of a young woman who spends her days in a cramped shed-like room with her 5-year old son.  We learn as the film goes along that she has been the unfortunate captive of a man who kidnapped her seven years prior.  Since she has a five year old, your mind can fill in the blanks as to what has happened to her over this period of time.  Now, I do believe there's a fascinating story here somewhere.  Unfortunately, that's not what I saw onscreen. What we have is a family drama that might have worked better as a thriller.  Instead we get a slog of a story about a very emotionally damaged woman and her almost equally damaged child.  A tragic story?  Yes.  An interesting one?  Debatable.  William H. Macy and Joan Allen co-star.
**3/4 stars

The Driftless Area- This film is an example of quirkiness getting in the way of practicality.  This story could have decent if it was just told as a straightforward thriller.  But, it all becomes a little too whimsical and weird to hold the narrative together.  A young man begins a relationship with a mysterious woman who has a connection to a vicious local criminal.  As he falls for the mystery woman, he may discover that she just may not still exist in the land of the living.  As I said, this could have been interesting as a supernatural thriller of sorts.  The thriller elements are decent enough, but, it's a little too "cute" outside of those elements to recommend.  Anton Yelchin and Zooey Deschanel star.
** stars

Carol- An adaptation of the novel, "The Price of Salt", this 1950s period drama follows the forbidden relationship of a well-to-do older woman stuck in a marriage of convenience and a younger department store sales clerk.  I'm not usually one who enjoys no frills dramas, but, I was pulling for these women to find happiness.  But, I can only marginally recommend it because it is annoyingly slow.  Oh, is it slow.  Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara star.

***stars

Concussion- Will Smith stars as the famous (infamous in some circles) Dr. Bennett Omalou.  While working in the Pittsburgh coroner's office, he began investigating the cause of  NFL players mental deterioration.  What he discovered would rock the league as it tried to scramble for cover for years and discredit Omalou in the process.  It's a decent performance by Smith and fairly solid movie.  But, it still felt a little "safe" overall.  If you did follow this story in real life, you know there was a lot more meat on this bone that would paint the NFL in an even worse light than what is depicted in the film.  Albert Brooks and Alec Baldwin co-star.
*** stars

The Last Witch Hunter- Vin Diesel's foray into sword and sorcery.  Yeah, let's hope it's his first and last.  Dull and plodding, The Last Witch Hunter follows Diesel as an immortal knight/hunter in the modern world, the last of his kind.  Witches walk among us, my friends, and they want to reign death on the world.  Working with a clandestine organization within the Church, Kaulder (Diesel), goes on the hunt for the resurrected witch queen who he killed centuries prior.  Diesel's "too cool for school" acting style doesn't really fit the ideal of the noble knight.  Give him a gun, a switchblade, or muscle car and fine, I'm with you.  A flaming sword of vengeance?  Didn't quite work for me.  Elijah Wood and Michael Caine co-star.
**1/2 stars

 Ratings Legend
Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Worth a look.  Better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. I'm doing my happy dance!
5 *= Pure eye candy. I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good