The Innkeepers

Reviews from the Dark Side presents
The Innkeepers
Released 2/3/12

What happens when Ghost Hunters meets The Shining? You get something like The Innkeepers, a 2012 movie that I don’t ever recall hitting theaters. You can currently rent it On Demand through AT&T U-Verse through March 31. I’m not sure if On Demand is the same with every provider, but if you’re interested in a night of good old fashioned scares, be my guest and rent this “classic.” Just because people don’t remember this being released doesn’t mean it’s bad right?

The Innkeepers follows two would-be ghost chasers who happen to work as front desk clerks at the Yankee Pedlar Inn. The Yankee Pedlar Inn is a New England hotel whose best days are behind her. The Inn doesn’t attract many guests these days and the owners have decided to shut it down, leaving our two intrepid (?) clerks/hunters, Claire (Sara Paxton) and Luke (Pat Healy), to operate the hotel in its final weeks. This staff of two really has no interest in hotel management. However, being students of the supernatural, they are very interested in the old legends of the hotel being haunted. They spend their time searching the Inn for traces of paranormal activity which Luke will post on his website. That is, if he finishes it! They don’t find much until Leanne Rease-Jones(Kelly McGillis) checks in. Remember Kelly McGillis? The attractive woman who played opposite Harrison Ford in Witness and Tom Cruise in Top Gun. The years have not been kind, but back to the story. Leanne is a former television star who shares the clerks’ fascination with ghosts. Together, they begin to unravel the mysteries of the Inn with deadly consequences.

This movie commits the cardinal sin when making horror movies. It’s not scary or even creepy. I would have settled for creepy. The first corpse/ghost you see is 51 minutes into the movie. Yes, I did say 51 minutes into a 102 minute movie! Prior to that, it’s our two goofy clerks (mostly Sara) snooping around the hotel finding nothing. After Sara wakes up to a corpse bride ghost in her bed, the horror comes a little more frequently, but not frequently enough for this horror maven. The movie is directed by Ti West. His other credits include Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever and The House of the Devil. 

I’ve read other reviews of this film and the director and it’s mostly glowing commentary. Well count me as one of the detractors! Sorry, but this was a total waste of my time. And to think I paid $5 for this tripe. I’m thinking of calling AT&T and asking for $10 back!

The Dark Lord of the Sith says:

0 stars

Ratings Legend

Zero *= Don't waste your time. Pure dreck! Dreck is too good for this! Blind me please!
1 *= Fuggedaboutit!
2 *= Average, Mediocre, Nothing Special
3 *= Good viewing. Much better than a poke in the eye.
4 *= Great. Could possibly foot the price of a non-Matinee.
5 *= Pure eye candy. Hall of Fame material here.